GOK WAN & JAKE GRAF

TV presenter Gok and trans activist and director Jake knew of each other but had never met until their shoot. But there’s no better time to show solidarity with others than at Pride

GOK WAN

When did you first realise you were different? I was six years old and I fancied Mr Leavesley at school. He was so fucking cool. It wasn’t sexual, I was fascinated by this grown man. But my journey continues every day when I learn something different about my sexuality. A lot of people don’t want to be defined by their sexuality, but I have no problem with that. My sexuality is absolutely in the foreground of my life. I want to continually grow as a gay man, but I get verbally queer bashed every single day of my life. Walking down the street I hear “queer” or “faggot”. However, I’m very fortunate [ to be on TV]. So, actually, you should ask the question to a small gay boy in the Outer Hebrides or a trans kid living in deepest Wales. Why is it important to hear stories from other parts of the community? The first thing I thought to myself was, “I’m going to be on a cover with Jake, a guy who I’ve never met before.” I opened my house for this shoot, but because you guys are all part of our community, I naturally have something in common with you. I want to be friends, hear your story. I want to share the humour, do all those things. And that is something that shouldn’t be disrespected. In that, Jake and I instantly have something in common. We’ve got a coming out story to share, activism, and the fact that we are part of this community. It is such a wonderful blessing.

JAKE GRAF

Where do you see the fight for LGBTQ rights going? There appears to be a lot of division within our global community. It feels like everyone is striving for visibility – as if certain communities are feeling erased by others, which may not be the case, but that’s what it feels like [ to me]. When did you first realise you were “different?” I knew that I was a boy in a body that didn’t feel like my body at about three years old. I was riddled with anxiety and self- doubt. It was only at 26 that I saw another trans man for the first time and realised that’s what I was. I felt hope for the first time, and as soon as I transitioned, everything changed. I found what it was to feel ambition and drive, to feel acceptance and found my place in the world. I had a sense of belonging and pride walking down the street, no longer crippled with anxiety and self- loathing. What does sharing a cover with Gok, somebody you didn’t know, mean to you? We all have a lot to learn about each other, we all feel it’s easy to get kind of caught up in your struggle: “It’s harder for trans people than it is for gay people,” or “it’s harder for gays than it is for lesbians.” None of us really understand unless we sit down and talk. When push comes to shove, we are all being bullied, beaten, and vilified by the same people. It is only through unity we can overcome — by being kind. @ therealgokwan @ jake_ graf5