HELLO AND WELCOME TO THIS, THE NEW ISSUE OF BSH!

I’m going to (shock horror) start this month’s editorial by talking not about bikes, but cars… it is bike relevant, honestly, don’t shoot me… The other day I had to go down near to Hertford to collect a load of bike bits, too many to carry on a bike, in the car and, because my little Clio’s not the fastest thing on the planet (he said, a master of understatement), decided to go cross-country rather than use the M11. I’d just turned off the A505 towards Barley and Barkway when I looked in the mirror and saw a bike-mounted policeman behind me, and I thought something like, ‘Ah, okay, best keep an eye on the speed then’. Like I said, the Clio’s not particularly quick, but it’s easy to speed in 30 and 40mph limits if you’re not careful. About fifteen miles later (or however far it is), just outside Puckeridge, just before the roundabout where you join the A10, his blue lights came on. My immediate thoughts aren’t printable in a family magazine (but they involved a naughty word for procreation), and also I was annoyed at myself ‘cos I’d obviously not been paying as much attention to my speed/ driving as I should’ve been. I stopped, turned the engine off and, rather than make him come to me, hopped out of the car, and walked towards his bike. “Hello, officer,” I said. “It’s okay,” he said, “I’m not stopping you for anything bad I just need to know something... do you ride a motorbike?” “Err, yeah,” I said. “Been riding them a long time?” “Umm, about 37 years.” “I knew it!” he said. “Within a mile or so of following you, I thought ‘that guy rides bikes’, and after a couple of miles I could pretty much predict where your brake lights’d come on, and the line you’d take through bends before you took them. You drive as though you’re riding a bike.” “Oh,” I said, frantically trying to think back to whether I’d slowed enough for limits, or’d crossed the white line when I shouldn’t’ve done, “was I speeding? Didn’t think I was...” “Well, you were a little bit faster through the bends than we’d perhaps recommend, but you weren’t much over the limit – two or three miles an hour tops. And in villages you drove slowly, and gave parked cars a wide berth, and were very cautious – just like you should be on a bike.” “Oh, err, good.” I said, feeling a little happier that I wasn’t going to get a ticket (I’ve not had one since my last speeding ban in 2000, and try quite hard not to get them these days). He and I then had a chat about bikes for a bit, and then he got back on his and left, and I carried on down the A10 to my destination, quite pleased with the compliment – I only passed my car test in November last year, y’see, and don’t consider myself to be much of a driver (actually, given the number of times the courts’ve taken my licence, and the number of accidents I’ve had, I don’t consider myself much of a rider either, but we won’t go into that now, eh?) so being told that my driving’s good (that’s the way I chose to take it anyway) kind o’ made my day, y’know?

Anyway, moving on, so, despite the fact that we’re odds on for a second wave of coronavirus deaths, the Government’s relaxing its lockdown rules, and more and more places are opening. Sadly, as I said last month, bike events’re still not really going to be going ahead, bar one or two – the Malle Mile (www.mallelondon.com/the-mile) is still (at the time of writing anyway) on at the end of August, as is the Yorkshire Pudding rally (www.mapevents.co.uk), and the Farmyard Party (same web address) at the end of September. NOTAS in Norfolk have an Old School Camp Out on the third weekend in September (details on Facebook), and others are putting on smaller, reduced numbers events, too. Only time will tell if they do actually go ahead, but we can only hope.

See you next issue!