Having babies is a family affair!
When Sally Peach fell pregnant, she had no idea that her teenage daughter, Olivia, would have similar news…
I’ll always remember the moment my daughter, Olivia, phoned to tell me she was pregnant. Not only was I really excited about becoming a grandmother, but I was in hospital awaiting my own 12-week scan. One minute, I’d been mentally preparing to become a mum again, the next, I was being told I was going to have a grandchild. It was overwhelming, but it also created a deeper bond between my daughter and me. I had Olivia when I was 17 and, although it was hard being a young mum, it really spurred me on to go to university and pass my driving test.
Even from a tender age, Olivia dreamed of having her own children. But when she was 18, she was told she wasn’t ovulating and would probably never conceive naturally.
She’d been devastated, and I was heartbroken for her, because I knew exactly how she felt. I’d had two boys after Olivia, and thought my family was complete. But just as Olivia was diagnosed, my broodiness kicked in again.
And so, at 37, me and my partner, Dave, decided to try for another baby.
I felt horribly guilty – especially when I conceived and had to tell Olivia. After all, this might be something she’d never experience.
So when she called to say that she was just eight weeks behind me, I was thrilled.
However, that didn’t stop me having reservations.
While Olivia was excited at the thought of us having babies together, I was feeling apprehensive.
My mum passed away 11 years ago, but she was so helpful when I had my children. I’d always wanted to be like her, hands-on and fully involved. But how could I do that for my daughter with a newborn of my own?
And this was her first pregnancy! I didn’t want mine to overshadow it.
Olivia was still living with us in Nottingham while she and her boyfriend, Richie, saved for a house.
Olivia and I went to antenatal appointments together, shopped for cute baby clothes and watched countless episodes of One Born Every Minute.
I’d expected Olivia to breeze through pregnancy and for me to struggle because of our ages, but the opposite was true.
I felt great, while Olivia had to be hospitalised with severe morning sickness.
But we loved sharing our
maternity milestones. When I had my 20-week scan or felt the baby kick, Olivia was really excited. Then two months later, it was her turn.
And discovering we were both having boys was amazing.
However, two pregnant women living under one roof was explosive at times – especially towards the end when we were both huge, hormonal and fed up!
I was coming to terms about the fact that my little girl was grown-up and our relationship was about to change for ever – and I also worried about going through childbirth again and caring for a newborn.
We started arguing about silly things – snapping at each other and not talking for days – while Dave stayed out of both our ways. Thankfully, two weeks before I gave birth, Olivia and Richie moved into their house and, with the extra space, our relationship improved immediately. I gave birth to my son, Luca, at Nottingham City Hospital in January 2013, with Dave by my side. Nine weeks later, I was back in the same delivery suite with Olivia and Richie when she had Morgan. She was even in the same bed! Being at the birth meant leaving Luca in the middle of the night with his dad to manage the night feeds, and leaving straight after the birth to get back to him, but I was determined.
I’d worried I’d feel like a mother to both babies. But when they arrived, I could clearly distinguish my love for Luca as his mother, and that for Morgan as my grandson. I adored them both, but in different ways.
Yet the boys are like brothers, not uncle and nephew. We had a joint christening for them, and they see each other often.
People have asked me if, initially, I’d have preferred not to have a joint pregnancy with Olivia. But now, at 41, I wouldn’t change a thing.
It was hard at times, but sharing pregnancies and raising our sons together has made us an incredibly close family.
Olivia, 24, says,
‘When Mum announced she was pregnant, I was happy, but also jealous. Six months before, I’d been told I might never conceive.
‘I’d been with Richie for 18 months and, after my diagnosis, we’d stopped using contraception. I was shocked when I missed my period.
‘Mum and I have always been close, and I knew the situation would bring us closer. ‘But we both fretted about how it would affect our “roles”. ‘While Mum worried about being a proper grandmother, I was concerned I’d be too wrapped up in my own baby to form a bond with my new little brother. ‘Despite worrying about other people’s reactions, we never had a bad one. Anyone who saw us was curious, but ultimately positive.
‘We’d planned I’d be with Mum when she gave birth, but she changed her mind. She worried if her labour was hard, it’d make me anxious.
‘Thankfully, Morgan’s birth, in March 2013, was straightforward. He weighed 8lb 15oz.
‘Although I enjoyed sharing my pregnancy with Mum, I got to experience carrying a baby on my own when I fell pregnant with my second son, Cosmo, now two years old.
‘It was wonderful to have Mum fully focused on me, and I know she enjoyed it, too. I ended up getting the best of both worlds.’
‘Living under one roof was explosive. We were both huge, hormonal and fed up!’