Vanessa and Mandy

When we lost my dad last year, my mum threw herself into the world of social media, playing innocent crossword games with friends online. I don’t know when she made the leap, but she admitted to me recently, in floods of tears, that she’s got into online gambling. She can’t seem to stop and is racking up serious debt, which, as a pensioner, she hasn’t a hope in hell of paying off. How can we fix this – the debt and her compulsive behaviour?

Ruth, Glasgow Unfortunately, there’s no quick fix. It sounds as if, entirely without realising it, your mum has evolved from a problemfree crossword lover to a full-blown online gambling addict. Fortunately, you have realised she has two serious problems and needs urgent help with both. Contact Citizens Advice for help with her debts, and Gamblers Anonymous for advice – they have an excellent programme to help put her on the road to recovery. Don’t be judgemental or make her feel she is being criticised. She needs as much understanding, empathy and constructive advice as you can muster.