BMW R1250RS
On paper (and looks) the Beemer is the touringiest of the sports-tourers. Looks can be deceiving
Propping the R1250RS between to the tall, stocky Ninja 1000SX and short, compact GSX-S1000F feels like squeezing a cruise ship between a couple of high-power playboy yachts. Or so I imagine. Sure, it’s got the comfort and facilities and blingy trimmings, but surely there’s no way something that looks so long, low, heavy and built purely for distance can hope to compete with shorter, sportier, lighter sports-tourers.
And it can’t. Lob the R1250RS down a tangled B-road at pace and you find the other three bikes can all be ushered between the hedgerows with less effort for a given speed. The BMW is the longest and has the laziest chassis geometry, and when it comes to point-and-shoot it is bottom of the pile. But things change drastically when the roads open out and there’s more distance involved. For smooth, brisk, effortless country-crossing rides the big boxer is truly exceptional.
The BMW strides across the landscape with substantial punch and steadfast road holding, making the Kawasaki feel frantic and the Suzuki seem skittish in comparison. With steering that manages to be weighted and yet balanced at the same time, the RS swoops and glides on open roads, its length and road-hugging stance giving a great sense of unflappable confidence. And yet also of easy handling – the way this quarter-of-a-ton bike can dance from full lean one way to full lean the other is remarkable, as is its ability to pick and hold a line. This Exclusive version has Dynamic ESA (electronic suspension adjustment) and in Road mode there’s a Gs-like floatiness to the rear shock, though it doesn’t seem to affect the 1250’s ability to carve up roads. Change into the sportier Dynamic setting and all becomes tauter and more precise, though it’s only really needed if you’re intent on chasing the Suzuki down a squirming road. With the front forks reacting to weight transfer you can also stop the RS on its nose – only the Yamaha feels more secure under stupidly hard braking, and that’s cheating by having two front wheels. Such soaring progress is made easier still thanks to the 1254cc variable-valve boxer engine. With a monumental 105 lumps of torque delivered at the kind of revs where even the Suzuki is still stretching and yawning, the BMW is the master of thump. And yet this remarkable engine spins up freely and rushes to its 9000rpm rev limit while averaging 50mpg – the best here by some stretch. ‘Fuelling is pretty much perfect,’ notes Hugo, ‘and you don’t ever notice the Shiftcam doing anything – well, other than making the engine staggeringly flexible.’
Though slicker and cleaner-shifting than gearboxes on BMW’S boxers used to be, the six-speeder in the RS isn’t entirely happy with the two-way quickshifter. It’s fine shifting up with revs and load, but changing down always feels like you’re asking it to do something that it rather wouldn’t.
There are oodles of other adornments that really do make life easier. As well as the ESA this Exclusive features cornering ABS, hill start control, assorted riding modes, cruise, keyless ride, prep for a GPS, LED headlight, heated grips, and some tubing hanging off the back to carry big boxes (there are mounts for clip-on cases too). It’s all tweaked and sorted from the robust switchgear on the data-riddled widescreen TFT dash, which can also talk to your phone and offer turn-by-turn directions. The base model RS is £12,395 and all the gizmos take the Exclusive to a significant £14,255 – but then the BMW makes even the blinged-up Kawasaki seem a bit lacking.
It’s not all about flashy stuff, of course. The tug-and-move screen is effective, the riding position isn’t as low and scrunched as its feel suggests, the squidgy seat stays comfy on long days, there’s a centrestand (handy for lubing the… no, hang on…), and the good, solid, wellplaced pillion grab handles like to corrode.
The R1250RS is great, however, there are three things stopping it being the greatest of sporty tourers. First, it won’t put flame to undercrackers on a test ride – it takes acclimatisation and miles for its true brilliance to shine through. This is because of the second point – its bias is definitely towards the swift distance-eating side of the sportstourer balance. And three, and perhaps most significant, the BMW costs almost 30% more than that pesky Kawasaki.
‘For effortless country-crossing rides the big boxer is truly exceptional’