Cleaning kit
When a shiny motorcycle is required, here’s what we rummage for
Potion options
» Dr Downpipe (£16.99, Halfords) etches away the oxidised coating on mild steel exhausts that take hours to sort with wire wool. Far safer than using Harpic 10x too. My T-cut (£10.99, Screwfix) is meant for buffing light scratches but is great for any dull paintwork. STP’S heavy duty brake cleaner (£6.99, Ebay) has halved the time it takes me to clean brakes – it’s fierce stuff. The Comma carb cleaner (£7.75, Amazon) is gentler, so you can use it around seals and gaskets without drying them out. The green thing is a mitt (£4.79, Halfords), with soft material on one side and rougher on the other. I use it all the time and it’s lasted a three years so far. JW
White spirit and a rag
£4.99 local hardware shop » Fancy cleaning products are very useful (and I’m a big fan of degreaser, bulk bought brake cleaner with a pump action applicator, and pre-wash fluid too) but I also rate old fashioned white spirit, and an old fashioned rag, especially for cleaning chain lube and brake dust from wheels – and the paint brushes you used for the living room skirting boards too, obviously. It’s a skin irritant, so you should really be wearing protective gloves to apply it. Support your local hardware shop. HW
Motoverde Bike Wash and After Shine £8.00/£12.00
motoverde.com » Being a lazy git the thought of using a squillion different potions to gain that showroom shine makes my chamois shake with fear. Thank god for the alchemists at Motoverde who concocted a salt free wash that removes the toughest shite and an After Shine that’s a shortcut to shininess. With the bike still wet you simply spray the potion all over and shove your ride back in the garage. No buffing, scrubbing or toothbrush nonsense. Next morning the bike is spotless, dry and covered in a protective film. Total time to wash the bike… 10 mins max. PL
WD-40 Silicone Shine £11.49
wd40.co.uk » I’d rather ride than clean, but like spangly machinery. Which is why I adore this silicone shine, as it not only does away with laborious polishing but makes cleaning easier. After washing your bike, lightly spray all over and it rapidly evaporates leaving a pleasing shine, and is especially good at making black plastic and rubber parts showroom-fresh. This layer then stops muck clinging and flies adhering, so makes the next wash easier. It prevents hoses and the like from aging, too. It also evaporates quicker than others I’ve tried, so you don’t end up with drips and runs. Shop around and you’ll pay a fiver. Essential. MA
‘Portugal is a great place to ride bikes. And eat custard tarts’