‘Mum died when I was 11, now I help cook, clean and care for my family’
Schoolboy on the reality of being a young carer to his father and younger brothers
AN inspirational Birmingham schoolboy cooks, cleans and takes care of his whole family after a tragedy when he was just 11.
Thomas Bailey stepped up to care for father Richard Frost, who has autism, and two younger brothers, alongside taking on household chores, after his mother sadly died.
Now aged 13, he is among hundreds of young carers looking after family members with disabilities or illnesses across Birmingham.
Though life has been far from easy for the schoolboy and his family, he said: “I like the satisfaction of looking after my dad and two brothers”.
Through children’s charity Spurgeons, which helps over 750 young carers city-wide, he told how he lost his mother two years ago.
“It’s been hard since my mum died. She passed away two years ago,” Thomas said.
“I look after my dad and my two little brothers. I do cooking, cleaning, washing; all the stuff the parents would be doing – not all of it, dad likes to step in and help!”
Both his younger brothers, William and Alfie, have ADHD, while William and father Richard have autism.
For Thomas, life is different from
what most of his peers experience.
He added: “Spurgeons make me feel I’ve got somewhere to turn to when I can’t really speak to the family. Some children out there, I’ve got friends at school, they’re all sheltered, they don’t have to do anything.
“They’ve got – usually – two parents looking after them, doing everything, earning the money, maintaining the household. It’s not that I don’t have that, but I’ve got less than what they’ve got.
“I quite enjoy being a young carer. I like the satisfaction of looking after my dad and my two brothers.”
He is one of hundreds of young people supported by Spurgeons, which offers practical and emotional support for young carers, along with trips for them to simply enjoy time being a child.
Richard said: “My wife passed away two years ago, that was really hard for us all to deal with, especially with our underlying medical issues anyway, it just added on an extra thing to deal with. “Spurgeons came in at that time and were fantastic. “Nobody before was willing to accept that Thomas was going through more than an average 12-year-old.” The family were referred through Thomas’ school when he was 12 and things have got a lot better
I quite enjoy being a young carer. I like the satisfaction of looking after my dad and my two brothers Thomas Bailey
since, said Richard.
Spurgeons service lead Jo Martin said: “It can be incredibly difficult for a young carers. We’re just scratching the surface, we know there are hundreds of young carers in Birmingham we’re not supporting.”
The service aims to provide individualised support for children between five and 18, with everything from first aid training and counselling to ensuring families receive the right benefits and housing for their needs.