It might soon be time to adopt the appearance of normality
AND JIM MOIR, (VIC REEVES), TELL
“I THINK I’ve put weight on my feet,” I complained to a friend having spent an afternoon trying on some old shoes, an activity which now counts as entertainment.
“No, you’ve just spent too many months in slippers. Your feet have splayed. A bit like flippers.”
She’s right, albeit I could have done with the news being delivered in a kinder voice.
But that’s what happens when the normal rules of society break down in the wake of a pandemic – you find that your stilettos simply become redundant and before you know it you’re eyeing the wide-fit section on Marksie’s website.
It’s a similar sad story with my beloved collection of office skirts and tailored pants. Once upon a time they were my uniform for work, my armour against the day’s meetings and deadlines, lovingly curated over time and half-price
French Connection sales.
But for the past year my outfits of choice have revolved around comfy jeans and leggings and now, thanks to the proximity of the biscuit barrel, I have made my peace with elasticated waists for the foreseeable future.
Smart office blouses? They hang, unloved, in the wardrobe. Jackets? Unless they are waterproof I have no use for them.
Even my much-loved ensemble of handbags now lie un-used in their dust covers. After all, you can’t get a Tesco shop in your average Radley.
I have also quite forgotten how to apply eyeshadow, have abandoned any pretence at painting my nails (who sees?), and with hairdressers not due to open again for months, I did the unthinkable the other night and took a pair of kitchen scissors to my barnet.
I was aiming for the pixie crop look. What I got was a 1980s troll doll.
Do I care? Not especially. If I now have to wear a hat on my Zoom meetings I shall just tell people the heating is on the blink.
And that’s been quite a revelation, this letting go of my old life – some may say personal care – and embracing a ‘that’ll do’ mentality.
Lord knows the twin challenges of lockdown and working from home have brought few positives, but not spending Sunday night ironing work clobber and shaving my legs is a blessing.
Sweatshirts and fleeces do not crease. And nobody from work has seen my lower half since March. It will have to stop though. Boris Johnson has produced his much anticipated roadmap out of this chaos and that means I need to think about upping my game a bit.
Face-to-face interaction might once again be possible with friends and workmates.
Which is why I have bought a pair of shoe stretchers.
And why my better half caught me dabbing Chanel No5 behind my ears before departing for the supermarket for the big shop.
A girl’s got to start somewhere.
Robert Redford appears in and directs The Company You Keep (Saturday, BBC2, 11.30pm) about a group of 1960s radicals whose past catches up to them. Susan Sarandon stars as a housewife who, after 30 years of living under an assumed identity, turns herself into the FBI over her part in an ill-fated robbery carried out by an underground militant group.
Her story prompts a young journalist (Shia LaBeouf) to do some further digging, which leads him to discover that respected lawyer Jim (Redford) was also once part of the cell. Realising he is now a wanted man and a murder suspect, Jim goes on the run to find Mimi (Julie Christie), the woman who can clear his name. It’s not the most exciting thriller, but it’s thoughtful and well-acted by the great cast.
You’ve been friends for more than 35 years and are now doing new podcast Joyride. What traits do you have in common?
Jim: We’re both very excitable and intrigued by things and ....
Jools: (Laughs) We’ve both got quite short attention spans.
Jim: We’re very inquisitive and I think doing the podcast helps... We do things that we like doing. I think the only way things can work well is if you enjoy doing them. Jools: Exactly. You’ve got to love what you do and love the people you’re doing it with.
Jim: When we first started doing it I don’t think we had much of any plan to be honest. You follow the trail and see where you go with it.
Guests include Bob Mortimer, Jane Horrocks and Chris Difford. How would describe the podcast?
Jools: It’s like having a chat with friends. These are people we know and love, but might see once a year in the pub or at a party and it’s great having time with and having a chat. I hope the listener feels they are at the table with us.
Jim: (Smiling) It’s eavesdropping. It’s travel and transport, but it’s really just a route to yarns and what we can prise out of guests.
Jools: In a formal chat show you get someone flogging something. Here you get people telling stories and get a sense of who they are, which is great.
Jim: I think some people were thinking it’s all about cars, but it’s not in the slightest. It’s quite the opposite to be honest. Food and travel, that’s what everyone does isn’t it, so everyone has got a story. Jools: Once people know it’s me and Jim, I think guests realise that the podcast is going to be fun and easy and relaxed.
Has it been hard staying at home because of the pandemic?
Jim: I can travel around my land, I can go a short distance in a car and go for a walk. I miss getting on a train and going places, but we’ll be back to normal before you know it. Jools has his model railway so he can travel quite some incredible distance.
Jools: Yes, I can go from my model of St Pancras onto my model Eurostar all the way across Europe to Berlin in the space of about 60ft, but I did find it bit upsetting when I realised I couldn’t do it in reality. I was re-enacting something no longer actually possible to do.
Most of my travelling, which I enjoy doing, is 98% through my work because we are travelling to shows around the British Isles and Europe. That’s my world, but we can’t do that now.
When I’m on tour I make a point of seeing sights and maybe taking an extra few days somewhere if it’s somewhere nice, so I do miss that.
What do you miss most?
Jim: The thing I probably miss most is going to a restaurant. I’m
JOOLS HOLLAND not much of a pub-goer, but I do like a restaurant so that’s me.
A year ago Bob (Mortimer) and I went on a mini tour about eight dates, eight places, just telling stories of our lives in showbusiness.
It was kind of organised because I said I’d like to go to Buxton and just have a nose around there.
We’ve done this before. I’ll be sitting in a van with Bob and will say ‘Can we go to Melton Mowbray to try the pork pies?’
That’s what I want to do. Just go somewhere and nose around. Jools: I like being on tour and sightseeing, but not everyone likes looking at stuff. There’s a great singer, Louise Marshall who sings with us, but hates travel. We’ve taken her to a lovely castle or gardens to look at or a sacred site, or a few stones from the Neolithic period in a foggy field somewhere and you never get her out the car.
We went to one of those fantastic abbeys up in Yorkshire noted to be one of the most beautiful sites in Britain. It was ravishingly beautiful and she just went ‘Urgh’ and threw a blanket over her head.
What is on your travel wish list?
Jim: I’ve been thinking about this, especially this past year. You put things on a back burner and can end up in your grave and not done anything.
I’ve always wanted to go to Yosemite National Park and I think I’ve just got to go and do it.
Jools: Yosemite is where I believe they have the gigantic redwood trees and they have an arch carved out of them.
There are photographs from 1960s of a bloke with all his family all waving out of them. I was so impressed by this that, when we built the studio where we now do the podcast, I put one of those trees there by the entrance so eventually it will grow into this great thing and you’ll be able to drive through it.
But apparently you’ll have to wait 500 years.
Jim: I went to Sequoia National Park which has the General Grant Tree which is the biggest tree in the world and it’s a sight to see. The top of it is in the clouds. It’s like 5,000 years old or something.
I’ve got a lot of places I really want to go and see before it gets too late.
MARION McMULLEN finds out more about the Red Planet 5
Six other spacecraft are currently observing Mars from above, including three belonging to the US, two European and one from India. 6
China tried to reach the Red Planet in 2011, sending an orbiter with a Russian mission, but the spacecraft failed to make it out of Earth’s orbit. Their robotic spacecraft Tianwen-1 mission, left, includes an orbiter and a rover and went into orbit on February 10. Its aim is to explore for underground water as well as searching for evidence of possible ancient life.
2 Nasa’s Perseverance America has rover, left, released the successfully first audio recorded on landed a the surface of Mars this spacecraft on week and images from the Martian soil nine landing site show the red times now since rocky surface with 1976. Its InSight mountains and a delta and Curiosity visible in the distance. The rovers are still car-sized robotic spacecraft operational. successfully touched down Perserverance on February 18 and it is was named by searching for evidence of schoolchildren ancient life and collecting following a rock and soil samples for nationwide possible return to Earth. contest. 7 8 9 The United Arab Several movie Mars is seen as an Emirates sent a blockbusters have been ideal candidate for probe to Mars last made about man’s bid exploration because year and it reached the to explore and live on it is close by in our solar planet on February 9. Mars. Matt Damon, system and is the Amal – or Hope – is the right, starred in most similar to first interplanetary 2015 movie The Earth. Evidence mission Martian about the points to it once for the dangers of being full of Arab surviving on the water, warmer world and Red Planet. and with a thicker aims to Several scenes were atmosphere, making look at the filmed in a desert valley it a potentially habitable upper atmosphere and in Jordan and the site was environment. The dust on monitor climate change also used as a location for the planet gives Mars its for at least two years. Mars in 2000 movie Red reddish glow.
Planet featuring Val Kilmer.
Visit our website at www.regionalnewspapers.co.uk to order your copy today! 3
Technology entrepreneur Elon Musk, below, is keen to reach Mars and even hopes to live there himself one day. His firm, SpaceX, has been working closely with
Nasa and the 49-year-old dreams of establishing a self-sustaining city, complete with iron foundries and even pizzerias. 4
The European Space Agency, along with the Russian Roscosmos, is hoping to send its first rover, named after English chemist Rosalind Franklin, to Mars. Originally planned for launch last summer, the ExoMars mission has been postponed for at least two years as a number of key tests still need to be carried out.
10
Don’t start planning a trip just yet. The Red Planet has almost no atmosphere and the average day is 37 minutes longer than a day on Earth. Gravity is only about 40% of Earth’s and one Martian year lasts nearly two Earth years because it takes longer to orbit the sun.
OLIVE
BOASTING about the foaminess of your sourdough starter would once have meant that you were avoided at parties. But for the past 12 months baking – and eating – has been one of the few opportunities for exploration.
Foodie magazine
Olive’s podcast appeals to all abilities of cooks, from chats with TV chefs to in-depth consideration of single ingredients.
Led by food director Janine Ratcliffe, there are more than 220 episodes, featuring everything from New York’s bakery scene to why we should all be eating more goat.
A series of four episodes about vegan food has just started. WHERE TO START: There’s a lovely interview with Bake Off’s Chetna Makan or the cider-focused episode from September will have you reappraising the drink. WHERE TO FIND IT: All podcast apps.
WHAT I KNOW NOW
Instagram influencer Amelia Liana’s look at dating and relationships is a fun and fascinating listen whether you’re hoping for romance or have long blocked out the worst bits of your single days.
Launched four months after being suddenly dumped by her fiancé, the first episode is an enlightening interview with relationship expert Shelley J Whitehead, whose coaching helped the host move on from her break-up.
But there’s nothing downhearted about this podcast. Amelia is a happy, generous presenter and her pals have a positive outlook on life. WHERE TO START: The dating horror stories episode from last March is pure schadenfreude.
WHERE TO FIND IT: All podcast apps.
SOUR HALL
Doctor Who’s Pearl Mackie and Lucy Fallon (Corrie’s Bethany Platt) star in this psychologically spooky dramatisation of a short story by Naomi Booth.
The original story was so perfectly crafted that it’s impossible to improve upon but Laura Kirwan Ashman’s audio drama fleshes out the characters and simple plot, as well as the supernatural elements, in a way that’s faithful to the original.
Ash (Mackie) moves to a farm with her girlfriend where they are forced to confront the heartbreaking moments of their separate pasts as they try to build a life together.
The actors bring huge warmth to the roles, making you really care about them as they struggle through.
WHERE TO START: Episode one.
WHERE TO FIND IT: It’s an Audible Original podcast, as is Hag which features the original story.