I can’t explain it but suddenly it dawned on me, I just knew, George was dead...
Atomic Kitten singer Kerry Katona bravely opens up about the moment she learned her abusive ex had died
ONCE labelled ‘the nation’s sweetheart,’ Atomic Kitten singer Kerry Katona rose from foster care to stardom, but soon found herself judged and ridiculed as mental health problems and bad decisions derailed her life.
In her new book, Whole Again, which tells her life story over the past 10 years, she opens up about her doomed marriage to third husband George Kay who she tied the knot with in 2014. Stuck in an abusive relationship she felt powerless to leave, Kerry finally found the strength to cut ties with a man whose mental health problems and drug abuse threatened to destroy her and her family.
Kerry says she could never escape the fear that George would one day return. When a call came out of the blue in 2019, some tragic news was to end her nightmare once and for all...
It was Saturday 6 July, 2019. I hadn’t spoken to George in a year.
I had completely moved on from him and it had made things easier in a lot of ways, as the kids had got used to George not being around as a result.
At last, there was no more back and forths, no more splitting and reuniting, things seemed… stable.
On that awful day I was headed to Harley Street with [my fiancé] Ryan, seeing a doctor for some sort of vanity procedure or consultation, I forget now but knowing me it was probably to do with my boobs.
As we pulled up outside, my phone rang. It was George’s dad, calling via Facetime. I started shaking. I can’t explain it but I knew full well something was wrong.
With the restraining order no longer in place, there was nothing stop- ping him turning up at my house to cause trou- ble.
And there would be no reason for his dad to be calling unless it was bad news. Every instinct in my body told me to panic.
I walked into the surgery trying to be my normal, bubbly self, but my heart was in my mouth. Of course I couldn’t just ignore it. Why was his dad trying to ring me now, after all this time? Suddenly dark thoughts started racing through my mind.
This must mean George is on one. Has he got our daughter DJ?! Is he anywhere near my kids?
I sat through the consultation in a daze before hastily wrapping it up so I could get out of there.
I’m not sure if Ryan clocked my unease or not, but if he did he didn’t say so at the time. Afterwards we got back in the car and my phone rang again. It was George’s dad. Oh Christ.
“Ryan, George’s dad is trying to ring me, what’s going on?” I spluttered.
Ryan couldn’t offer an explanation any more than I could and just seemed perplexed that I wasn’t answering. But I needed to keep the phone line free. I needed to speak to the kids. I didn’t want to face whatever information George’s dad had to tell me.
Unforeseen panic started to rise in my throat as I called home. All five of my children were there, Molly and Lilly were looking after the little ones. Lilly answered.
“Lock the door,” I said.
“Why?! What’s going on?” she replied.
“Just do it now, please. George’s dad’s ringing me and I’m worried he might be down south. So just do what I say.”
Lilly didn’t argue, she agreed she’d lock up and came off the phone. My breathing was getting heavier – there was nothing to stop him going to the house, or trying to take DJ. The kids would be powerless if he turned up!
The phone rang again. It was my thenmanager,
Paul.
I can’t explain it, but suddenly it dawned on me. I just knew.
My heart sunk. I turned to Ryan as the phone buzzed in my hand.
“George’s dead,” I said. “What are you on about?” Ryan was always calm, no matter what. “It’s probably George himself calling you now to wind you up. He’s probably on one, it’s the weekend.” “It’s not George, Ryan, it’s Paul.”
I answered the phone. Paul spoke first. “Kerry, darling, where are you?” I didn’t even bother to answer. “You’re calling me to tell me George is dead, aren’t you?”
He paused. “I am, love. He’s gone.”
My first thought was: how the hell was I going to tell the children? And in particular, how was I going to tell my five-year-old her daddy is dead?! My heart ached for DJ and for George, who would now never have the chance to meet again. But Ryan, he kept on holding me. Who does that? Who consoles a girlfriend as she weeps over the death of her estranged husband? It was a sign of what a good man Ryan was.
It turns out George had died after eating a ball of cocaine he’d stashed in a sock. After everything he’d been through, that was the way he went out.
Mental illness and drugs had finally taken him.