Mum thought she’d killed her new baby
SHE TELLS OF POSTPARTUM PSYCHOSIS TORMENT AND HAILS NEW HELP
ATORMENTED mum who believed she had killed her newborn daughter and had images of ending her own life in the Menai Strait, has opened up about her struggle with a severe mental health condition.
Sally Wilson developed postpartum psychosis after giving birth to daughter Ella in May 2015. The condition is the most severe of a wide spectrum of post-natal mental health problems and can lead to symptoms including hallucinations and delusions.
The 37-year-old from Caernarfon suffered her first psychotic episode just days after Ella was delivered via Caesarean-section following a difficult labour.
During the ensuing confusion, she believed she had killed her newborn daughter, and like up to 20% of women in the UK, continued to struggle with her mental health in the months following birth.
Sally said: “When I was ill, I really struggled with my bond and attachment with Ella. I was getting constant images of going out into the Menai Strait and ending it all.
“Because I was so ill, I couldn’t really focus on her and I had to have help from family, friends and childcare providers because I couldn’t do the simplest of things such as feeding her, and at times I didn’t want anything to do with her.
“I probably missed out on the first year (emotionally), of my daughter’s life, which makes me feel so sad and guilty sometimes.”
Now fully recovered, Sally is encouraging other new and expectant mums who are struggling with their mental health to access support.
She’s welcomed the introduction of a dedicated perinatal mental health service in North Wales, introduced by Betsi Cadwaladr Health Board with funding from the Welsh Government.
It provides treatment for mental health problems affecting women in pregnancy and the postnatal period, and training for all NHS staff who come into contact with pregnant women.
Sally added: “It can be really scary to admit that you are struggling and it is hard to believe that you will ever get better, but with the right treatment and support, you will.
“When I was ill there were no specialist teams in our area. Myself and my husband fought quite hard to get specialist care, but it shouldn’t have to be that way. It is a really positive thing that the perinatal mental health service has been introduced with the hope of educating and training those who care for and treat pregnant women.
“Mental illness in pregnancy, particularly severe mental illness, needs to be identified quickly and this can only be done if health professionals are trained in recognising the symptoms and then knowing what to do.”
Sally hopes sharing her story will give hope to other new and expectant mums struggling with their mental health.
She said: “When I was ill, I could never ever have imagined the relationship I have with my daughter now. Although it has been the toughest time of my life, I feel lucky that we are here, healthy and happy.” ● Referrals to BCUHB’s perinatal mental health service can be made via a GP, midwife or health visitor.
The free and confidential CALL Mental Health Helpline for Wales is available 24/7 on 0800 132727 or by texting ‘Help’ to 81066.
To find out more about postpartum psychosis and the range of support available, visit www. app-network.org/ ● If you have been affected by any of the issues featured in this story call the Samaritans on 116 123. The call is free.