CAR (UK)

And lo, he did perspire

What does a man have to do to get some proper air-conditioni­ng around here? Beats us

- ANTHONY FFRENCH CONSTANT

THIS MONTH, I have mostly been leaking like cream cheese in an old sock. Close to the point of all-out warfare with the XC60’s airconditi­oning system in the recent unpardonab­ly hot weather, I must admit to having lost a little faith in Volvo’s much vaunted human-machine interface. If you stab the Auto button on a car’s aircon controls, you want air of a temperatur­e more usually associated with head-butting a supermarke­t bag of ice, in yer face, as soon as is technologi­cally possible. This, for reasons best known to itself, the Volvo steadfastl­y refuses to eŠect...

All that happens is a •lurry of noise as the system whips up great gouts of air which then singularly fail to emerge from any vent at all, let alone those pointing at one’s perspirati­on-beaded •izzog.

I’ve tried adjusting the required temperatur­e setting from a sensible 19C to something called ‘Lo’, but still so little happens that I have to assume this is merely an old-fashioned instructio­n to gaze at something riveting out of the window.

Indeed, the only solution seems to be to dial up the required vents oneself, and likewise accelerate the fan speed. And that’s just far too much hot •idgety fuss and bothersome itch in this age of supposed •inger-snap automation.

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