Judges see just how spe­cial the town is

Carmarthen Journal - - News - PHILEVANS­col­umn Co­me­dian Phil Evans from Am­man­ford is known as the man who puts the “cwtsh” into com­edy

LAST week the judges of the Great Bri­tish High Street de­scended on Car­marthen for a whis­tle-stop tour and to see just how spe­cial the town is to so many peo­ple.

It was a chance for them to meet traders and shop­pers and see for them­selves the at­mos­phere the town cre­ates, es­pe­cially on mar­ket day when the out­door stalls bring an added buzz.

We were de­lighted when we found out that the Cham­ber of Trade had en­tered Car­marthen in to the pres­ti­gious awards, and thrilled when we dis­cov­ered it is among the four Welsh towns short­listed.

As a coun­cil we have been pleased to sup­port the nom­i­na­tion, and of­fi­cers from our eco­nomic de­vel­op­ment team have been work­ing closely with all those in­volved to en­sure the judg­ing panel gets the best pos­si­ble im­pres­sion of the town.

On the day of their visit, we of­fered free park­ing in all coun­cil-run car parks in the town cen­tre, and of­fi­cers also ac­com­pa­nied the judges on their walk­a­bout, tak­ing the op­por­tu­nity to talk to them about fu­ture plans in­clud­ing the restau­rant at Guild­hall and the pro­pos­als for Jack­son’s Lane.

Now, all we need is for peo­ple to back Car­marthen and help to give it its mo­ment of glory. I hope as many peo­ple as pos­si­ble vote by us­ing the hash­tags #MyHighStreet and #GBHSCar­marthen ZOM­BIES! Who likes me!

They never brush their teeth, shave or change their clothes.

They never send Christ­mas cards or in­vite you around for drinks on a Fri­day evening.

Which is just as well . be­cause they’re rub­bish small talk. Most an­noy­ing all, they move so slowly.

You have to wait for ages if you’re stood be­hind a cou­ple of them at the su­per­mar­ket check-out. And they take all day at re­verse park­ing.

While you and me know there are no such things as zom­bies, there are peo­ple who be­lieve they ex­ist.

These aren’t im­pres­sion­able hor­ror fans who’ve watched ev­ery ver­sion of Night Of The Liv­ing Dead and its many se­quels, re­makes and spin-offs.

They’re not lit­tle ’uns who know about zom­bies thanks to “fam­ily-friendly” scary films like Ho­tel Tran­syl­va­nia and episodes of Scooby Doo.

Thank­fully, any “zom­bie” fea­tured in that long-run­ning car­toon se­ries turns out to be the evil pro­pri­etor of an aban­doned amuse­ment park who (in the clos­ing min­utes of the episode, as he’s taken away by the cops) com­plains that he could have got away with it . . . ’em? Not . . at of “If it wasn’t for you pesky kids!”

No, ac­cord­ing to a re­cent sur­vey, 25% of adults who were asked, be­lieved a zom­bie apoc- alypse could hap­pen, and had taken steps to pre­pare for it.

They’d stock­piled food and wa­ter and planned safe routes out of their home city or town into the moun­tains and forests.

Pre­sum­ably be­cause they think zom­bies rarely en­joy coun­try ram­bles or go hik­ing in the hills. Now, if the 25% of peo­ple who be­lieve in zom­bies are the same in­di­vid­u­als who be­lieve that the world is run by Lizard Peo­ple; that the Loch Ness Mon­ster ex­ists; and that one day Ca­su­alty will end its 30-year run, we have noth­ing to worry about.

But if they’re not (and there are mil­lions of gullible peo­ple out there who truly be­lieve in these things), then this Hal­loween the rest of us have good rea­son to be scared!

You can fol­low Phil Evans on Twit­ter @phil­e­van­swales or visit www.phil­e­vans.co.uk

Pic­ture: Pic­to­rial Pa­rade

A line of un­dead “zom­bies” walk through a field in a still from the film, Night Of The Liv­ing Dead.

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