Say goodbye if people aren’t interested
PEOPLE can make you feel small without saying a word. Humans have certain ‘tells’ that give away their true feelings. For example, if a friend asks how your career is going and before you respond they immediately look down at their shoes, they’re merely going through the motions and aren’t remotely interested in your answer or career.
During 2020, a writer friend was offered work on a stage project due to open in 2023 and in June this year he was invited to the first (Covid safe!) workshop/rehearsal in London, pleased to be part of the creative process again after such a long time.
His friends in the ‘business’ were happy for him and genuinely interested in the show’s progress. However…
While he was away, a married couple he and his wife had known for years had phoned his house and been told he was rehearsing in London.
In the past he’d given them free tickets to several TV and stage shows he’d written, so, when they turned up one afternoon, just after his return home, naturally my friend thought they might ask him what he’d been doing in London as he was very excited about his involvement with such a prestigious project.
Yet, unbelievably, while the visitors sat around drinking tea and eating cake, they made no reference to his London trip.
They didn’t ask one question about it, even when his wife mentioned the London hotel he’d stayed in – a natural jumping-on point for them to ask a question . . . had they been interested.
As the afternoon turned into evening, it became obvious they were making a deliberate point of not mentioning his new project – for reasons he couldn’t fathom, which left him puzzled and a little hurt.
As his friends are far wealthier than he and his wife will ever be, surely they couldn’t be jealous of his small success and if they really weren’t interested why did they call in so soon after his return home?
My take on this is, our lives are short and we shouldn’t have to spend precious time with people who treat us with disdain or contempt.