Will you get the right gift?
WITH December 25 less than a month away, (“Nothing much gets past you, Phil!”), if you haven’t already bought the special person in your life the extra special present they deserve, be aware that the clock is ticking! Unless the batteries run out.
As for you, gentlemen, you don’t want to be one of those individuals who wanders around the shops on Christmas Eve having left present buying for their wife, girlfriend or partner (or indeed all three!) to the very last minute.
They think we don’t notice them, but they stand out a mile, usually wearing garish Christmas jumpers with snowflake patterns so bright they burn your retinas.
They also wear the haunted look of men who’d prefer to be quaffing festive pints at their local with their mates, but realise the terrible truth that the only drinking establishment that any man who, at four o’clock on Christmas Eve afternoon, has no idea what to buy their loved one… is the Last Chance Saloon!
That it doesn’t occur to some men it just might be a good idea to think in advance about what to buy their nearest and dearest explains why many of them often end up purchasing weird and not-so-wonderful, not to say useless, gifts, as revealed in a recent Top 40 list of the worst Christmas presents people have received.
These include a pair of nail clippers, a box of tea bags and… a kitchen mop!
Apparently, the man who bought that last present for his wife spent Christmas Day in his local A&E, having it removed from a very intimate, and no doubt very tender, part of his anatomy.
So, he wouldn’t have made much use of the present that was once (genuinely) given, gift-wrapped, to someone’s partner – a toilet seat!
Other presents that very little if any thought went into, were an air freshener and a set of windscreen wipers.
Who would think they’d make an acceptable gift for anyone... unless they were attached to a brand-new car?
Fortunately, present-buying won’t be a problem for me this year because my partner told me she doesn’t want me to buy her anything.
So she won’t be at all disappointed on Christmas morning to find there’s nothing under the tree for her from me.
Not even nail clippers.
Will she…?