Blamed for my boy’s brain damage

One minute my son was sleeping peacefully, the next his life hung in the balance

Paige Ferguson, 27

As I strapped my baby into his car seat, he looked back at me with a gummy grin.

Colton was just 6 months old but already his blue eyes sparkled with mischief.

So lucky...

Being a mum had come so naturally, I couldn’t remember what life before Colton was like.

Now, he was me and my fiance Blake’s little shadow.

It was March 2018 and we were off to a friend’s for dinner.

By 9pm, Colton was starting to doze off in my arms.

‘Someone’s sleepy!’ Blake, 31, smiled.

‘Best put him down for a snooze,’ I said.

Blake and I gently placed Colton in the middle of our friend’s queen-size bed.

He normally slept in a crib and wasn’t crawling yet, so I was sure he wouldn’t move.

Still, I packed pillows all around, to stop him rolling. Just in case. As he snoozed, we quietly closed the door.

A minute later, I heard an almighty thump. And a scream that made my stomach turn erupted from the bedroom.

Rushing in, I scanned the bed for Colton.

But my baby wasn’t where we’d left him. Then I saw him – on the floor. ‘Oh my gosh!’ I cried, rushing forward to scoop him up.

He was writhing about, screaming uncontrollably.

‘It’s OK,’ I soothed, rocking him gently.

Slowly, he stopped screaming and broke into his familiar grin.

Such a relief!

Then I noticed a raised bump above Colton’s right ear.

Within minutes, it’d swollen to twice the size.

‘We should get that checked,’ I said, alarmed.

‘I’m sure it’s nothing serious,’ Blake said.

But mother’s instinct was telling me the opposite.

Cutting the evening short, we rushed to the local hospital.

There, Colton began vomiting violently. Then was suddenly grey and lifeless.

‘What’s happening to my baby?’ I screamed.

Doctors whisked him away for an urgent CT scan.

Crippled with guilt, I paced up and down the hospital corridor. Couldn’t believe what was happening.

We’d only gone to a mate’s house for dinner.

Now my baby was in hospital, his future – and potentially his life – hanging in the balance.

‘I never should have put him on the bed,’ I sobbed.

‘It’s not your fault,’ Blake soothed. ‘These things happen.’

While I was pregnant, I’d read about safe sleeping and never leaving a baby alone in bed.

But I’d reckoned if I surrounded Colton with pillows he’d be OK.

Everything had happened so quickly…

A doctor came to see us. Explained that when Colton had fallen 2ft from the bed to the carpet, he’d suffered a skull fracture. Now he had a bleed on his brain. I lowered my head into my hands and wept.

We were shown to Colton’s bedside in ICU and I took Blake’s hand.

‘I’m so sorry,’ I said. ‘This is all my fault.’

Blake shook his head.

‘You can’t think like that, Paige,’ he replied. Seeing my baby wailing and in such distress broke me.

Colton was transferred by air ambulance to Le Bonheur Children’s Hospital, an hour away in Memphis, Tennessee.

There, he had emergency surgery to relieve the pressure on his brain.

The two-and-a-half-hour wait for news was torture. Finally, the surgeon appeared. I hoped she’d tell us we’d all be going home soon. Instead, her face was drawn. ‘Colton is very, very ill,’ she explained. ‘There’s a chance he won’t make it.’

During surgery, Colton’s

I heard a thump, then a scream that turned my stomach

heart had stopped. It’d taken 10 minutes to bring him back.

Though he was now stable, his life was on a knife-edge.

With bandages wrapped around his head, he had dozens of wires connected to him.

Machines breathed for him, keeping him alive. I prayed for a miracle. Our lives went on hold as we travelled between home and the hospital over the next month.

I remained by Colton’s side while he underwent more surgery and dozens of blood transfusions.

He’d suffered permanent brain damage, the effects of which only time would tell.

Whenever I was away from him, I was consumed with anxiety.

One night, I opened up Facebook, desperate for a few minutes of distraction.

Scrolling through social

media, I felt compelled to share our story.

I began writing, warning people about the dangers of head injuries in babies. My son only fell 2ft and he may be brain damaged for life...

Writing it down caused my chest to tighten.

I’d been in denial, but seeing the words in black and white made me realise Colton would never be the same again.

I begged people to take any knock, even a minor one, seriously. Stressed the danger of letting their baby sleep on a bed.

Within days, my post was shared over 18,000 times.

It was a comfort to know my warning was reaching families far and wide. Then… In April 2018, a miracle. Colton was able to go home, despite his brain damage. But we also had other news. I was pregnant. ‘What if Colton needs all my attention?’ I worried.

‘A brother or sister might be the best thing for Colton,’ Blake replied.

Colton had regular checkups while Blake and I cared for him at home, here in Arkansas.

I was so worried. Didn’t let him out of my sight.

Exhausting – but for me, there was no other way.

In time, doctors told us Colton, now 14 months, was defying the odds and would survive. But we had many challenges to face.

Before his accident, Colton had babbled happily.

Now, he’s irritable, even when we give him a cuddle...

Doctors don’t know for sure the impact of his injuries. But I’m just so grateful he’s here.

When our baby arrives, I’ll never make the same mistake I did that fateful night.

The risk isn’t worth taking.

I felt compelled to share our story, to warn people