A letter to… my fabulous son
You were an Internet sensation in your rainbow tutu
Dear Desmond,
I’ll never forget that day when I sat watching telly with your dad Andrew, 45, and a small figure tottered into the lounge.
You were only 3, but you’d managed to slip into a pair of my heels and a pink T-shirt.
So cute!
While your big sister Meagan, 12, enjoyed sports, you loved dressing up.
Always cobbling together costumes from bed sheets, bubble wrap – whatever you could get your hands on!
In the shops, you headed for the Disney princess gowns.
Your dad and I reckoned you were just creative.
‘All kids love dressing up,’ Dad agreed.
Then, in the autumn of 2011, I was sitting watching
Rupaul’s Drag Race.
It’s a TV show where reality contestants compete to become the next drag queen superstar.
Suddenly, your attention was completely fixed on the screen.
You were too young to understand, but you seemed enthralled by the costumes, the colours and larger-thanlife characters.
Over the next few years, you kept watching the show with me, and started wearing skirts.
Dad and I wanted you to be happy, and a therapist advised us to let your gender identity develop naturally.
I was worried that some people would be cruel to you, especially at school.
Sometimes, you were happy in a T-shirt and shorts, but your love of drag blossomed at home.
We recreated some of your favourite sequinned looks from Drag Race. You wore wigs and I helped with your make-up.
In October 2014, you dressed as Elsa from Frozen for our town’s Halloween parade.
People cheered you on as you strutted your stuff.
Then, in summer 2015, we marched in the New York Pride parade.
You were an Internet sensation in your sparkling gold beret and rainbow tutu.
So proud of you, I set up a socialmedia account – Desmond is Amazing – to share your rocking outfits. You were only 8, so I monitored all activity there.
Good thing, too, as the trolls couldn’t help themselves.
This is child abuse, one wrote… You’re grooming him for paedophiles, said another.
I couldn’t believe that some people could be so cruel.
I hid it from you, wanting to protect your self-esteem. But, for every troll, there was double the number of well-wishers. Other drag kids got in touch, asking for advice. You told them,
Always be yourself.
Through your socialmedia success, you were scouted to appear in a music video by Drag Race winner Jinkx Monsoon. You were even invited to host a children’s drag runway event in 2017, at Rupaul’s Dragcon event in New York.
When we arrived, we were seated in the front row.
And when Rupaul himself prepared to cut the ribbon to open the show, he pointed to you!
‘I want to invite this gorgeous little queen on stage with me!’ he said.
You were on cloud nine in your sparkling pink dress, confidently cracking jokes.
That year, aged just 10, you had some news. ‘I’m gay,’ you announced. Now, you’re using your platform to do good, raising awareness of the struggles that the drag and LGBTQ communities endure.
Every day, your dad and I are amazed by your compassion and desire to help others.
I couldn’t be prouder to be on this drag journey with you.
It takes so much courage to be yourself, no matter what.
Keep doing you, Desmond!
Love Mum x
Wendy Napoles, 42, Brooklyn, USA
Visit desmondisamazing.com for more information