Se­crets on her phone



I caught my wife sex­ting a bloke on an on­line fan­tasy game. I threat­ened him phys­i­cally – and, on re­flec­tion, I shouldn’t have be­haved like that.

But it’s de­stroy­ing my life and health, wor­ry­ing about this.

How do I han­dle it? Bill, 32


Re­gard­less of whether any­thing phys­i­cal went on or not, this is cheat­ing. If you have to hide some­thing on your phone, you’re do­ing some­thing wrong.

I’m glad you recog­nise you acted wrongly in ag­gres­sively con­fronting the other man – your prob­lem’s with your wife, not him.

She’s get­ting plea­sure out of these racy texts, so you need to ask her why she feels the need to look for that plea­sure with some­one other than you. Then you and she need to work out if it’s an is­sue you can – and are will­ing – to fix.

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