SCOOPERMAN!

How often were you told by your metalwork or woodwork teacher... ’Measure twice, cut once’? It’s one of those maxims that can stand you in good stead your entire life, and not just when you have a saw in your hand either. Most of what we do in the shed or workshop comes down to planning and it’s something we all do instinctively or subconsciously. If you’re going to check the timing on your classic you’ll already have a mind map of where the necessary tools are, where to look up the required data if it’s not already logged in your brain, which way to turn the crank, etc. etc. Jobs we undertake on a semi-frequent basis we tend to carry out, if not automatically, then at least predictably. It’s when we’re ‘on the tools’ carrying something unusual, different or challenging that we occasionally foul up and, metaphorically, shoot ourselves in the foot. The installation of a freshly rebuilt motor into the frame of an ongoing project is always a pivotal point. Have I got all the nuts and bolts ready? Do I need to gets some wooden blocks to rest the engine on, or can I do it one lift? These thoughts and many more are part and parcel of such undertakings. And so it was whilst carrying out just such an endeavour that I stupidly overlooked something that should have been obvious. Fixtures and fittings to hand, sockets and spanner ready, engine lifted into the frame and bolted in place… the glow of self-satisfied smugness was almost tangible: cylinder heads on next and then the inlet manifolds ready to house the freshly re-built carburettors, but what’s this? Why can’t I locate the 6mm bolts in the back of the barrels? What the hell is going on? Slowly, the Light Bulb of Understanding begins to illuminate from a tentative glow to full arc light intensity. Who forgot to check out those half-a-century old internal threads then? Doh, that’d be me! And of course with the engine in the frame and the top-end built up, it’s not going to be quick job either because I really don’t want to strip the top-end off either. No, the tap holder won’t fit because it hits the frame, so it’s quarter turns with a small spanner and 6mm plug tap until all four holes are clean enough to accept the bolts. Just a few moments of thinking would have saved 45 minutes of pure purgatorial contortions. Measure twice, cut once, eh?

The sunny side of the classic world, with the VJMC’S Steve Cooper