Why are young people having less sex?

met the right man yet. Sex is something I think about often and can’t wait to try some day, but I’ve not yet been in a situation where I’ve felt comfortable enough. Plus, like many others my age, the cost of renting means I still live at home with my pare

❛IT DOES FEEL LIKE THERE IS A STIGMA ATTACHED TO BEING A VIRGIN❜

Alice Riley, 27, a marketing executive, lives in Reading with

her parents. She says, “It does surprise me that the statistics show there are so many millennial virgins, but I think it’s more common than people realise. My parents’ generation met partners organically, either in a bar or set up by friends. My generation uses apps, where it’s easy to build up a relationship with several strangers and chat to them for weeks. But then suddenly they’ll cut all contact and you’re left wondering what you said or did wrong, which is damaging for your selfconfidence. And they could easily be married and pretending to be single. You can be anyone you want online – it’s a minefield.

UNCOMFORTABLE

It’s not that I’m a virgin for religious reasons and I’m not against the idea of having sex before marriage, I just haven’t which would be awkward if I did bring home a potential partner.

I’ve fancied plenty of guys over the years but, in my teens, at 5ft 8, I was tall and awkward and no one looked twice at me. I had my first kiss at 16, but it never went any further. At university. I didn’t join in on the “hooking up” culture. I was more interested in having a boyfriend than meaningless sex.

I ended up befriending girls in the Christian Society because I had more in common with them; I couldn’t join in the sex talk with the girls in my halls.

In my third year, I had a boyfriend for a short time. He knew I was a virgin and was happy to wait. But while we had a few fumbles, our relationship didn’t last long enough for us to take things any further.

EMBRACING IT

When I was younger, it was something I was embarrassed about. But now I’ve got a great career – I write a dating blog – and I have travelled solo, and these things have helped me embrace my position, rather than feel awkward about it.

As a society, we’re very flippant about casual sex, so it does feel like there is a stigma attached to being a virgin. Porn is so accessible that people have unrealistic expectations about what sex actually is, too.

Sometimes, people can get offended when I say I’m waiting for the right person as they think it’s a judgement on their own actions, or they say things like, “you’re being naïve”, but I try to brush off those comments.

I date a lot, but I’ve found it hard to meet someone I’ve got a connection with. I do feel a bit envious when I see pictures on Facebook of my friends happily coupled up, but I’m confident I’ll find someone special – though my friends have warned me the first time you have sex can be disappointing, so I’m not expecting anything magical!

Each birthday, I do worry that time is getting on, but I accept it just takes a bit longer these days to find the right person.”