Sophie: “I was so depressed, I had suicidal thoughts”
Geordie Shore’s Sophie Kasaei speaks to Closer’s psychological therapist Emma Kenny about breaking up with her boyfriend of seven years, her parents’ divorce and finding happiness again
Sophie, you’ve had a rough S few years, including splitting with your long-term partner [Sophie’s seven-year romance with fitness model Joel Corey ended last year]. Tell me about that relationship… When I first got together with Joel, people would say, “What’s he doing with her?” He was gorgeous and ripped, and back then I didn’t feel I was the best looking. At the beginning, I was worried, but we stayed together for seven years and I got to the point where I realised he really did love me. It sounds like you were suffering from very low self-esteem… Yes, things didn’t go well for me for a few years. I wasn’t on Geordie Shore [Sophie was asked to leave the show in 2013]. I then started a business, which failed, and my parents divorced, but Joel stuck by me the whole time. People started to say he was with me for my fame, but I lost my fame – and my money – and he was still there. He really stuck by me, but last year we hit a wall. I wanted to settle down, but he wasn’t ready to settle down. It was an amicable breakup. We’ve not spoken since, but I see what he’s doing via social media and I really want him to be happy.
Tell me about your parents’ divorce…
It was a real shock as they’d been married for 26 years. The split was messy and my relationship with my mam was very strained for a long time. It was a very hard point in my life and a lot of things were going wrong. I wanted to be there for both of them, but was struggling myself. I’d opened a beauty and fashion boutique in my hometown and used all my savings to fund it – about £70k – but the business just stopped making money. I felt like I’d lost everything and I was left thinking, “What else can go wrong?” I was going out partying to take my mind off it and staying out for days on end. I had depression, and I started getting suicidal thoughts. I just didn’t want to be here any more.
What happened next?
Life started to get a bit better. I got a phone call from the producers of Geordie Shore to say they wanted me to take part in a reunion show. The reaction from the public was great and then they asked me back full time. I felt like I was being given a second chance at life, I was so grateful. I started taking care of myself more, too, so I felt better in that way as well.
How’s your love life now?
I’m in a new relationship. His name is Jay and we met on Instagram. We had an amazing first date, it was like I’d known him my whole life. He’s a normal guy and he’s from a close family. I’m 29 now, so if we’re still together in a year, I’d love to have a child.
Do you feel more secure in this relationship?
There are still moments when those doubts creep in and I’ll think, “Is Jay with me for me?” But he didn’t know who I was when I first messaged him on Instagram, so I know I need to work on my self-esteem. I’m so much happier. I lost 31/2st by the end of last year, which boosted my confidence [Sophie also revealed her new blonde look last week]. Me and my mum have been spending lots of time together and I am helping her to find happiness. I just try to be grateful and positive and appreciate what I have.
“Sophie has been through some very traumatic experiences during her life and come out the other end. What is striking about her is her refusal to give up and her resilience – she’s always found new ways to survive, both financially and emotionally. Sophie wants a family and has found a new partner, which is positive. She needs to remain mindful of her vulnerabilities to ensure she isn’t taken advantage of in the future by friends, family or a partner.”