Gay trans dads: “We can’t have kids – but we want 20 fake babies”
Sam and Henry reveal how they’ve completed their dream of a big family with £2,000 worth of ‘reborn’ dolls
Sam Arvonio isn’t your average dad. He has a staggering ten children – two of which he gave birth to before transitioning to a man, and eight of which are ‘reborn’ dolls.
Sam and his fiancé, Henry – who also identifies as a transgender man – dote on their brood of fake babies.
The pair take them out on shopping trips, and watch TV together on the sofa.
And Sam’s real-life children, Gemson, seven, and Emma-Leigh, four – both from previous relationships – love their little “brothers and sisters”.
Sam, 26, says, “Henry and I can’t currently have children of our own, but our reborn family is the next best thing. We’d love to have even more – 20 babies would be amazing.
“They each have their own personalities. For example, Tabitha has a princess attitude, she’s very serious and loves to be spoiled, while Kendall is laidback, and Ashton isn’t calm – he can be quite stubborn.
“We get a few looks when we take the babies out, but a lot of people don’t even realise they aren’t real. “Of course, I love my real children unconditionally – but I won’t neglect my other babies.” Sam began collecting reborns when he was just 13 years old. He says, “Like most little girls, I loved playing with dolls. I came across lifelike dolls when I saw one online, and I couldn’t believe how real they looked.
TRANSITIONING
“I was desperate to buy one, but as a teenager, the £300 price tag was huge. So, I saved up all my pocket money and I begged my grandparents to chip in.
“When I finally cradled my first doll – a girl called Little Rose Petal – I fell in love.
I’d stroke her hair and spend hours changing her outfits.”
Over the years, Sam, who works in retail, splashed out hundreds of pounds on reborn dolls. Often, he’d buy the basic moulds, then paint them from scratch. He’d even have to take on extra work in shops to fund his habit.
Sam says, “When money was really tight, there was the odd occasion when I’d have to sell one of my babies. It was gutwrenching saying goodbye.”
After a brief relationship in high school, Sam gave birth to a little boy, Gemson, in 2013. Three years later, he met a new partner, and had Emma-Leigh.
But during his second pregnancy, Sam began to wonder if he was transgender – feelings he’d never had before. He says, “During both pregnancies, I hated the way my body changed, I felt unhealthy and I thought my breasts looked enormous.
“With Gemson, I thought my confusion was down to hormones, but I felt the same way with EmmaLeigh, too.
“After her birth, I slumped into post-natal depression, and my gender dysphoria became even worse. My breasts were
swollen due to breastfeeding – I hated having such feminine curves and couldn’t even bear to look at myself in the mirror.
“It was then that I realised that I was living in the wrong body. I’d had a sheltered upbringing and never knew about transgender people until I left home. After speaking to friends about the way I was feeling, they suggested I might have gender dysphoria. My relationship with Emma-Leigh’s father was already on the rocks, but he was supportive about my decision to transition, albeit he was shocked. We’re no longer together romantically but we’re still good friends.”
Over the next year, Sam began experimenting with his appearance.
He says, “I slowly started transitioning into a man. When I needed a haircut, I had it cropped into a short style, and I’d buy clothes from the men’s section.
THERAPEUTIC
“My dolls provided comfort during such a difficult time. Cuddling what felt like a real baby was therapeutic and calming when my own children were asleep.
“Emma-Leigh has grown up knowing me as her dad – as I began to transition so soon after her birth – but I wasn’t sure how to tell Gemson, who was three at the time, that his mummy was becoming a man.
“In the end, I simply asked, ‘What would you think if Mummy turned into a boy?’ He thought it was cool! My family were very supportive, too – even my conservative grandparents. If my grandma forgot to call me ‘he’, my grandpa would correct her!”
In July 2017, aged 24,
Sam underwent hormone replacement therapy (HRT), then had surgery on his chest last March, to remove his breasts and give him a more masculine physique.
In June 2019, Sam met 19-year-old university student Henry, who has also transitioned into a man. The pair hit it off immediately.
Sam says, “Mutual friends
THE DOLLS SLEEP IN OUR ROOM AND WE SAY GOODNIGHT TO THEM
ALL BEFORE WE GO TO SLEEP
introduced me to Henry, as they thought we could help each other out on our transitioning journeys. Henry had always known he was born in the wrong body. He began transitioning into a male from the age of 15, and he never looked back, not even keeping pictures of himself from before the transition.”
“We started dating in June. When I introduced Henry to my collection of reborn dolls, I was nervous he might not understand, but he thought they were cute – he was even inspired to collect dolls himself.
BULLIES
“We can’t currently have children of our own, as I was sterilised after having Gemson and Emma-Leigh. But we’re happy with our reborns for the time being.
“We love taking them out for walks, or caring for them at home, such as changing their clothes and combing their hair. Our favourite thing is to go clothes shopping with them – we love dressing the babies in cute bows and onesies, but we have to limit our spending to £30 per trip.
“The dolls sleep in our bedroom and we say goodnight to them all when we go to sleep and then wake them up in the morning with a kiss and a cuddle.
“Gemson and Emma-Leigh always want to hold their brothers and sisters. EmmaLeigh is too young to actually play with them – she can be quite rough with her toys – but Gemson is very gentle.”
And Sam and Henry don’t care what other people think about their unusual collection.
Sam says, “Sometimes we’re met with criticism when carrying them in public, but if people want to make comments and stare, we ignore it – they’re bullies.
“Usually, people are just curious and friendly, and we’re happy to answer any questions.
“With Gemson, Emma-Leigh and our bundle of babies, we can be a complete family.”