“I lost 15st with an NHS gastric bypass – now I want my teen son to have one too”
Donna Rawlins’ 15-year-old son weighs 18st – more than double the average for his age – and she’s convinced surgery is the only way to cure his obesity…
Donna Rawlins struggled with her weight all her life. She was bullied at school for her size and, by the time she was 40, weighed 35st, wore a size 34-36 and struggled to walk up a flight of stairs.
SHOCKING
And sadly, history is now repeating itself – her son Ben is just 15 years old and already weighs 18st. In the last year, he’s put on four stone. Worried Donna believes the only way to help him is the same surgery as she had to finally lose weight – a gastric bypass.
Single mum Donna, 43, who’s an ambulance worker and lives with Ben in Havant, Hampshire, says, “Ben lacks the willpower to diet. He will start and lose a few pounds, but after two weeks he’s bored and gives up. Although he hates being the weight he is, he’s just not motivated enough and I feel sorry for him. I know how hard it is.
“I’m sure people will blame me for the fact that he is morbidly obese, but it’s more complicated than that. His over-eating is a mental illness.
“I’m really worried about him and his future. He’s not happy and gets bullied. Although he loves football and trampolining, he won’t do it, as he’s so selfconscious and gets out of breath so easily.
“I’ve begged doctors to allow him to have a gastric bypass, but they won’t agree to refer him as they say he’s too young. I’m at a loss of what to do next as I think it’s the only way.”
Donna’s weight problems started in childhood, too. Aged eight, she weighed 8st and was 15st at 15.
She says, “I had a very big appetite and would eat large portions of things like cheese and potato pies, with macaroni cheese on the side.
MAJOR SURGERY
“When I was 18 and passed my driving test, my weight really spiralled, as I’d drive everywhere instead of cycling or walking.
“I’d typically have a cheese-and-onion toastie for breakfast, a burger for lunch and then a large pizza for dinner. Everything I ate had lots of cheese on it.
“I also loved crisps and would often eat 30 bags in a day.”
Donna says she tried various diets over the years and when she reached 35st, lost an incredible 10st in 16 months, following the Atkins Diet – a low-carb eating plan – but doctors made her stop as they worried about her kidneys.
Then, in 2016, she was referred for a gastric bypass and had the operation on the NHS in April 2018. By then Donna,
who’s 5ft8, weighed 25st. Now she’s 10st 4lbs and is a size 12 to 14.
Donna says, “It was major surgery. They stapled my stomach to create a small pouch and moved my small intestine to connect to the upper part. But I wasn’t scared at all. I knew it was the answer to my problems.
“Now I eat tiny portions as it’s all my stomach will allow. I have one Weetabix for breakfast, fruit for lunch or a cereal bar, and my main meal might be chicken and mash.
“I’ve also started exercising. I love walking and aqua aerobics. I’ve got a lot of loose skin, which I hate, but I feel so much healthier and happier. I don’t regret the surgery at all.”
But while she’s lost weight, Ben is putting it on at an alarming rate.
ANGRY
Donna explains, “At 7lbs 4oz he was a normal-sized baby. His dad and I split up when he was four, but he only really started getting overweight when he turned seven.
“He would get very angry if he didn’t get the food that he wanted. I believe he’s got ADHD and Aspergers, although he hasn’t been formally diagnosed, despite me taking him to the doctors several times over the years.
“They say it’s a parenting issue, but he shows many of the signs and is very quick to throw a tantrum – he’s thrown plates at me and smashed up rooms.
“I admit, I do give in and let him have chicken nuggets if he wants them, to keep the peace.
“I do my best to monitor his eating. For breakfast, he’ll have three or four crumpets, then a sandwich for lunch followed by chicken nuggets and chips or mash in the evening.
“I don’t allow chocolate and crisps in the house. But he’ll go to a friend’s and eat them there. And the other day, I was clearing up in his room and found several chocolate wrappers that he’d hidden.
“I’ve been trying for years to get help for him. He’s seen paediatricians but they’ve told me that, until he’s ready to lose it, then there’s nothing they
can do. Ben gets so upset when I tell him he can’t have the operation – he wants it done so much and can’t understand why professionals say no.
“I long for him to have a gastric bypass. I believe it’s the only answer and would change his life dramatically.
SAD
“If I could afford to pay for the operation myself, I would, but they can cost up to £15,000 privately. He’s just getting bigger and bigger and I just have to hope that doctors will finally agree to letting him have a gastric bypass before it’s too late.”
Ben says, “I just feel really heavy and sad all the time. I just want to lose a bit of weight and get a bit skinnier. I’m keen to have a gastric bypass – like my mum had – while I’m still young.”
By Mel Fallowfield and
Karen Pasquali Jones
❛ I’M SURE PEOPLE WILL BLAME ME RIGHT FOR ALIGNED
CAPTION THE FACT HE’S MORBIDLY OBESE – BUT IT’S MORE COMPLICATED THAN THAT ❜