NHS crisis: “I don’t know how much more I can take”

There are now more coronavirus patients in hospital than ever before – and experts say NHS staff are mentally suffering more than soldiers in combat. Here, Closer speaks to some of those struggling on the frontline…

I’M SEEING YOUNG PEOPLE DIE, I BARELY SLEEP, AND I HAVE A CONSTANT SENSE OF DREAD

When cases of coronavirus began to fall in July 2020,

ICU nursing assistant Kate* hoped life would return to normal. The 31-year old was working 12-hour shifts treating COVID-19 positive patients – many of whom never left hospital.

But, just six months on, Kate is back on ICU. There are 50 per cent more coronavirus patients in UK hospitals than in April, and the Chief Medical Officer, Professor Chris Whitty, said January will be the worst month of the pandemic so far.

DEPRESSION

And Kate’s mental health is suffering more than ever.

She says, “When my alarm goes off in the morning, I know that I’m going to have to stand by as yet more patients take their last breaths. And this time, I’m seeing more young, previously healthy people die. I struggle to sleep, and I have a constant sense of dread.”

Kate is not alone. Nearly half of ICU staff have reported symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder, anxiety or depression, and experts say NHS workers are “suffering more than combat troops”. More than one in five ICU nurses have reported thoughts of self-harm or suicide.

Pete Arndt is director of the charity NIGHT, which raises funds to provide confidential private mental health treatment for NHS staff. He says, “Even before the pandemic, nurses were suffering. The suicide rate among the profession is 23 per cent higher than the national average, but COVID-19 made the situation worse. Staff shortages, long shifts and a huge influx of patients have had a huge impact. But many nurses felt they should just ‘get on with it’, no matter the emotional and physical cost – in fact, only one per cent accessed support.

“At NIGHT, we’re raising funds to provide nurses with confidential mental health support. We’re also setting up a peer-to-peer support service, to try to reduce the stigma of seeking out mental health support among the profession.”

Kate had been working for the NHS for five years when coronavirus hit the UK in

March 2020. She says, “I’m a physiotherapist, and loved my job. But in March, our service was deemed non-essential, and I was redeployed to work on the ICU of a big hospital in London.

“I worked 12-hour shifts, three or four days a week. Usually in ICU, it’s one patient per nurse, but at that time, it was six patients per nurse.

“It was harrowing, but there was a feeling of hope. The public were behind us – fundraising, doing the Clap For Carers, and sticking to lockdown rules. We thought that by the summer it would all be over.”

By June, Kate had returned to her work as a physiotherapist, seeing patients online and in person. But before Christmas, her clinic was closed again.

She says, “I was trained to give the vaccine, and that’s what I thought my job would be this time. But two weeks ago, I was told ICU needed me.

BREAKING THE RULES

“This time, working on the ward has been very different. Most of the patients I’ve cared for are under 70. People come in who are my age, with no previous health conditions. Just last week, I had to sit with a patient as he passed away, because his family weren’t allowed on the ward.

“And this time around, that sense of optimism has completely gone. We don’t know how long this will last, and the public aren’t as supportive – they seem willing to break the rules. When I go to work, the roads are still so busy.

“We even had one patient whose son refused to believe that COVID-19 really existed. He broke into ICU – without wearing any PPE – and demanded to see his mum.”

And Kate says the situation is taking a toll on her mental health. She says, “I’ve never experienced mental ill health before, but I’m not sure how much more of this I can take. When I wake up, there’s an overwhelming sense of dread, and it’s hard to find the motivation to get out of bed.

“I’ve had many sleepless nights, and I find myself thinking about the patients all the time. I’m really close to my family, but I haven’t seen them in months. One of my sisters is pregnant, and we’ve had a few pregnant women in ICU, so that terrifies me too.

“The hospital I work for has made a therapist available for NHS staff, but I don’t feel like I can take the time to visit her. I need to get through my stint on ICU first – however long that ends up being.”

For now, Kate urges people

to stick to lockdown rules.

She says, “A lot of people – especially if they’re young and healthy – seem to believe that COVID won’t affect them, but it doesn’t discriminate.

“It’s amazing that we have the vaccine, and my nursing colleagues are some of the best I’ve ever met. Hopefully, soon this pandemic will be over. But in the meantime, my advice is to act like you have COVID, even if you don’t.”

By Kristina Beanland

● For more information, visit Nightfornurses.co.uk