DON’T HIDE BEHIND SCREENS WHEN YOU NEED TO OFFLOAD

When things aren’t going well or someone has upset you, it’s easy to hammer away on a WhatsApp message or grumble on Twitter, but we benefit far more from a proper conversation

Whenever I feel annoyed, I call my sister to have a rant. There is something wonderful about releasing that stress with someone who fully accepts me and who allows me the space to vent without judgement. She does the same after a bad day, and we inevitably end up laughing about something totally unrelated.

AVOID NEGATIVITY

In the past 15 months, many of us have felt anxious, frustrated and angry, and with social media at our fingertips, sharing these emotions has become common, but it can be counterproductive. Social media can often be an echo chamber, where you have your negative feelings reinforced, as opposed to resolved. This means that instead of working through what is going on at a deeper level, you find yourself stuck in a loop, meaning you end up feeling worse, or at least no different.

MAKE REGULAR CONTACT

Online interactions simply don’t have the depth or capacity to meet your human needs. We are hard-wired to require physical interaction – without enough of this, you are likely to fare badly emotionally, psychologically and physically. Make a commitment to call a friend or family member after a bad day, and to regularly meet up with your loved ones so that you can let it all out while enjoying a delicious cake and a cuppa. Physical interactions do more than provide you with an outlet – they help you to feel valued, accepted and validated, which reduces stress, and helps you work through the reasons you feel upset or annoyed.

When sitting opposite someone, you can also fully engage with them, picking up on non-verbal cues like a reassuring smile or an empathic nod, which can encourage you to be more open about how you feel. Even just a phone call allows the tone of a person’s voice to soothe high emotion.

PRIORITISE QUALITY TIME

Research shows that the people who live the longest and healthiest lives spend quality time with people they love, so next time you have the urge to text your best mate to vent about your husband or boss, pick up the phone and call her instead.