Guest column:
Shaughna Phillips
Since I appeared in Love Island at the beginning of last year, I’ve had a big platform of followers on social media. I put up pictures every day and of course I want them to look good.
Two weeks ago, I was accused of Photoshopping a picture I put up. Yes, I admit I did, but it was to edit out a wheelie bin in the background – I didn’t change anything about the way I looked. I use filters to make the photos look better and Photoshop to remove things, not to edit my body. Someone commented, “Photoshop” and I replied,
“Jesus, you should try it, judging by your pictures.” I didn’t even look at their pictures, but I thought, “That might make you think the same things you wanted me to think.” I’m hot-headed and, when people are being nasty to me, the gloves come off!
The way I see it, my Instagram is my income, so it’s a bit like a shop window for my business. My pictures need to be the best quality they can be to get other jobs. When you’re an influencer, your followers hold you to a higher standard. People have the right to filter their photos. I’m not necessarily saying it’s a healthy thing to do, because you’re almost making your own image unattainable, but I don’t think people should be vilified for it. Trolling will only make the issue worse and I’ve had my fair share.
I’ve always been self-conscious about my legs and I knew there’d be comments about them when I went on Love Island. I struggled in the villa, too, because I was the biggest girl in there.
But a good thing to come out of the show was, after, someone alerted me to lipoedema – an abnormal build-up of fat – so I went to see a consultant, who diagnosed me with it. I had liposuction on my calves in September, and my confidence has definitely grown. During the recent hot weather, I didn’t think twice about wearing shorts .
I’m not totally happy in my own skin, but I really do want to get there. I’m never going to be a tiny size 6 and I’ve started to accept that. I’ve started following girls on Instagram that look like me – a size 12, with a bit of cellulite. I’ve had a bit of a shift in my head recently. I can’t be promoting, “You should love yourself” to my fans when I find it a bit hard to love myself in private.