learning ‘Having a disability can make harder’ finding love

Sas, 32, from Worthing, would love to meet someone who likes football as much as she does

I’m not sure what being in love feels like. Every relationship I’ve been in has gone badly. Girlfriends have taken advantage. Some have said, ‘You can’t go out with that friend,’ or, ‘You can’t do that.’ Others have asked me to buy stuff all the time, without buying me anything back. I have cerebral palsy, as well as a learning disability. I can’t always tell when someone’s being unkind.

Now, I’m single and loving it. I can do what I want. I see friends when I want. I’m the cool aunt to my nieces and nephews.

I’d like to find someone, but only if they’re the right person. My dream girlfriend would be pretty and kind. They might need to have a mild disability like me. I get excited and have made mistakes getting into a relationship before I know if the person has a kind personality. They’d need to not take advantage of that and understand my needs. I really hate being late, and I need support with things like money and figuring out how to get to places if I haven’t practised lots of times before.

My family and mates are supportive. They’ve seen me upset when partners haven’t been nice, given me advice about what to do and told me if something isn’t right. It can be hard to see some friends on dating apps that don’t feel safe for me to use. Others have houses and kids. At times I’ve asked why I can’t be like them. But there’s loads I can do that they can’t.

For a date, I’d take a girl to the cinema or bowling or maybe to an Italian restaurant. If I could meet a girl who loves football that’d be ideal. I’d propose on a beach. We could have a football wedding. And on our wedding day, I’d wear my Brighton kit.