We can’t grieve for all the tragedies in the world

IS IT my faulty memory or did the 10th anniversary of Princess Diana’s death receive rather less attention than the 20th? In no time it will be the 25th anniversary. Will we do it all over again?

In the BBC One documentary tomorrow – Diana: 7 Days – William and Harry say they were dazed by the public’s hysteria. Prince William, 15 at the time, remembers thinking: “You didn’t even know her, why and how are you so upset?”

And that is the big question. Since her death, Britain has been endlessly congratulating itself on becoming a country which is more in touch with its feelings. But there is a downside to that.

Of course it’s desperately sad that a young woman with two young sons meets a violent and sudden death. But if you don’t know her personally, then – as William said – why and how are you so upset?

Terrible things happen to people every minute of every day but if we grieved equally for all of them then we’d go mad.

One regrettable legacy of Diana’s death is that it has become almost shameful to admit that one can have only limited empathy for tragedies that befall those we do not know. In the overheated world of instant communication in which we now live, maintaining distance and perspective is difficult. But I think we should try. And ask the question: “Why and how are you so upset?”