Don’t kick off over game
IT’S going to be one of those strange Monday evenings when you switch on BBC1 expecting The One Show, EastEnders and something typically gloomy-doomy on Panorama, only to find those have all been ruthlessly swept aside in favour of MATCH OF THE DAY LIVE: THE FA CUP (BBC1, 7pm).
Now, personally I can’t say this bothers me. I’ll gladly watch pretty much any old football. But I do know there are others who feel differently, millions of avowed football haters who acknowledge that live matches have their place on TV but who argue that its place isn’t here. They will not be pleased.
So to them I’d like to say: Relax. I understand your grievance but why not just give tonight’s match a go? It’s Chelsea versus Manchester United, after all. Big clubs, big stars, battling it out for a place in this year’s quarter-finals. You never know, you just might find yourself immersed in the drama. Indeed, it could turn out to be something of an epiphany.
And remember, BBC1’s coverage only lasts three hours.
Or, OK, possibly a bit more than that if it goes to extra time.
Or, all right, a bit more still if it then goes to penalties. So, four hours at the most. But, yes, it could be life-changing.
Just let me clarify one thing. You’re likely to hear this match referred to beforehand as “a repeat of last year’s final”. This is the sort of nonsense that football types spout all the time.
I appreciate that the BBC loves a repeat, but a repeat of last year’s final would mean they were re-screening Chelsea’s 1-0 win at Wembley from last May, which would obviously be ridiculous. Even I would get cross if they’d cancelled EastEnders etc. just to do that. Actually, no, I probably wouldn’t. Of course, if you do find yourself engrossed in tonight’s match you’ll need to catch up later with COLD FEET (ITV, 9pm), which comes to the end of its current run tonight. Relationship-wise, the big story right now is the romance that’s developed between old pals Adam (James Nesbitt, below) and Karen.
That kiss they shared at the ropey rock festival has turned out to be a tad more meaningful than either dared admit at the time, which seems fair enough, but how will the rest of the gang react to the news?
It will, after all, disrupt their group dynamic to a spectacular degree.
Well, Jen, I can reveal, goes ballistic. As if she doesn’t have enough to worry about, as she heads for her latest chemotherapy session.
For Karen’s ex-husband David, on the other hand, there’s happier news at last, as he gets chummy with the owner of a local café. Pretty soon he’s offering her advice on how to boost her profits, not that she seems entirely appreciative. Elsewhere tonight, the latest episode of THE SECRET LIVES OF SLIM PEOPLE (C4, 8.30pm) meets a woman whose digestive system may explain why she stays so slender. Digestives are a staple fixture of my own dietary regime, and yet in my case they seem to have the opposite effect.