Break your phone addiction – for good!
The Allen Carr method has helped millions quit smoking. Now its experts are determined to tackle the UK’s obsession with digital devices
DO you find it impossible to sit on a train, in a bar or even watch TV without checking your phone? Do you spend hours each day gaming?
Do you worry about missing out if you don’t check your social media every few minutes?
These are all indications of digital or tech addiction, a fast-growing problem in the UK that has been linked to unprecedented levels of stress, isolation and sleep issues.
ARE YOU ADDICTED?
Addiction doesn’t have to be a substance, like nicotine or alcohol. It can be based in a behaviour.
Digital addiction is a new behavioural addiction which involves excessive compulsive use of digital devices.
Most digital users don’t realise they are being controlled but you may have a suspicion.
If, when you want to stop, you can’t, or it’s extremely difficult and requires all your willpower, you may be addicted.
WHAT IS ADDICTION?
Addiction is tied up with negative emotions. Stress, depression, fear, heartbreak, loneliness and boredom are just some of the feelings that will drive people to seek comfort. If you think you can find it from digital devices, normally via social media and gaming, that’s what you’ll turn to.
You may not realise it, as you reply to a message or count the “likes” on your post, that the sense of gratification you feel is all it takes for the addiction to begin.
HOW DO YOU STOP?
What does it mean to stop? Are you supposed to spend the rest of your life without using another digital device? Of course not.
Taking control of your digital life does not mean avoiding technology altogether. It means using it whenever you genuinely need or want to and putting your phone or tablet down happily and without stress once you’re done.
BANISH THE BRAINWASHING
It’s easy to believe that constant use of digital devices and apps is necessary if you want to keep up with modern life.And in truth, it is very difficult to live without devices as there are few jobs left that don’t rely on computers, phones and tablets.
On top of that, your phone, email and social media have become how you connect with the world.
But when they are constant sources of intrusion, demanding attention every second, you have a problem.
As a digital addict you have been brainwashed into believing you cannot live a meaningful, connected life without your phone.The challenge, as with every addiction, is to reverse the brainwashing.
HAPPY DIGITAL USER
What sort of digital user do you want to be? Think about how you want to feel and write it down. For example: “I want to feel less badgered by my phone.” Put your phone aside, close your eyes and notice the peace.
Imagine yourself as a happy digital user, able to put your phone down and only look at it when you really need to.Think of it like a screwdriver – a tool designed for certain jobs. There’s nothing exciting about it but it has its uses.
So what is your phone actually useful for? Remember, the aim isn’t total abstention but abstention from junk apps and junk use.
Define which apps are practical and useful and which are addictive junk by going through your phone and sorting them into two lists.
Useful apps include: maps, music, banking, weather, transport, shopping and communication tools such as video calling and text messaging.
The real junk will stick out like a sore thumb.This is also a good time to think aboutWhatsApp and Facebook groups. Do you need to be in so many? Don’t worry about people taking offence if you leave a group, just explain that you’re trying to reduce the number of groups you’re in and they can send you a message if they want to get in touch.
CHANGE YOUR MINDSET
Your brain is moulded and remoulded by the way you ask it to perform. This is how people become experts in specific fields. It is also how we become addicted.
The plasticity of the brain determines not only knowledge but beliefs and attitude too – our mindset.And the brainwashing you’re bombarded with about digital apps is designed to give you the mindset that they are a treat and a comfort.
Thus, you are deluded into thinking that happiness lies in the very thing that’s causing you misery.
There are two myths that keep you trapped in this mindset: that junk apps, gaming and social media give you pleasure and that quitting them will be hard and make you miserable.
REMOVE ALL DOUBTS
Take a moment to think about all the good things you stand to gain by overcoming digital addiction: self respect, more time and energy, quality moments each day for yourself and your family.
The little boost you feel every time you reach for your phone is a mere hint of how you will feel all the time when you’re free.
Once you can see that digital junk does nothing positive for you and that the beliefs that keep you trapped are merely illusions, you will realise you have everything to gain and nothing to lose by quitting.
DON’T FEAR MISSING OUT
You might worry that living the rest of your life without your usual fixes will be miserable and boring.
But the truth is your addiction actually reduces your ability to derive pleasure or excitement from anything. Once you’re back
FrOm PaGe 29
in control and you’re not turning to devices for emotional reasons, exposure to digital junk won’t be a problem.You won’t be interested in it and junk apps will only hook you if you use them.
GET REAL ABOUT DIGITAL USE
Be honest about how much time you spend on screens. Nearly everyone underestimates their daily phone usage and for digital addicts it can be by as much as half.
If you think you spend 90 minutes on your phone each day, chances are it’s more like three hours.
PAUSE AND PAY ATTENTION
When you go to look at your phone, pay attention to how you’re feeling and ask: “Do I really need to look at my phone now?”, “Will it give me satisfaction?” and “What am I expecting to gain?” These questions allow you to pause, interrupting the impulsive, mindless use that is symptomatic of digital addiction.
Think about how each app you use or group you’re in makes you feel – good or bad, stimulated or numb, satisfied or frustrated, distracted or focused. Use this information when making your list of useful and junk apps, which will determine what you keep and what you get rid of.
SORT AND STREAMLINE
Your home screen is the gateway to the digital world. Instead of setting it up with an enticing image of a tropical beach, choose something that makes you stop and think.
For example, a picture of a question mark or a statement such as “pay attention”.
Next, arrange your apps. Referring to your list, remove all the junk, keep borderline apps away from your home screen and only have useful apps immediately visible.
If you don’t have to swipe to find things, you’re less likely to be distracted by apps you don’t need.
IGNORE EMAIL
Email is useful but is also one of the most intrusive
parts of digital liife. Ideally, turn off notifications and remove it from your home screen. Then, treat your email like regular
mail but one that makes three deliveries a day. Schedule a time for dealing with emails in the morning, lunchtime and at the end of the day. For the
rest of thee time, ignore it. This scheduled approach will make you much more efficient as you’ll be answering emails in blocks rather than in dribs and drabs.
BAN NOTIFICATIONS
All apps can send you “push” notifications, regardless of whether you’re using the app or not.This is not only distracting but will keep you hooked, as it’s hard to resist looking to see what the notification says.
Look in the settings section of your device and
disable push notifications one by one.This will rid you of one of the most intrusive aspects of digital devices.
ENJOY HAPPY HOUR
Happy hour is the 60 minutes before you go to sleep, which should be spent doing other things than looking at screens. It makes you happy because it enables you to get a good night’s sleep.
The blue light emitted by screens fools your brain into thinking it’s still daytime, which suppresses the sleep hormone melatonin. If you spend the time before you go to bed staring at your phone, your brain won’t be ready for sleep and you’ll have a restless night.
GET A WATCH
How many times do you check your phone simply to find out the time? Go old school and get a watch. It’s a great way to avoid looking unnecessarily at your phone.
NOW YOU’RE READY
These practical instructions can help you escape digital addiction. Follow them with an open mind and you will make your digital experience a more peaceful, relaxed and fulfilling one.You’ll be aware of how your devices affect you and most of all, you will enjoy the feeling of regaining control.
Extracted by MERNIE GILMORE from Smart Phone Dumb Phone: FreeYourself From Digital Addiction by Allen Carr with John Dicey (£9.99, Arcturus). To order a copy call the Express Bookshop on 01872 562310 or visit expressbookshop.co.uk