It’s time to rein in the rhetoric

“WHAT IF every single one of us was a raindrop?” asks Prince Harry. Something to do with the world being on fire and we all have to try to put it out.

He has clearly totally, utterly and unambiguously fallen in thrall to Californian nonsensical psychobabble, but it can’t help but remind me of Madeline Bassett, to whom Bertie Wooster occasionally finds himself engaged.

Madeline is one of PG Wodehouse’s great comic creations, who thinks that, “the stars are God’s daisy chain, that rabbits are gnomes in attendance on the Fairy Queen, and that every time a fairy blows its wee nose a baby is born”.

She is also the most terrible raindrop, sorry, drip.

EASYJET is threatening to charge customers £ 24 each way to use the plane’s overhead lockers. Why don’t they just have done with it and put everyone in the hold?

WE ARE living in a golden age of television, or at least on- demand streaming. If you want to see one of the best thrillers in decades, tune into The Undoing, which came to a climax this week that practically had me stop breathing.

Who cares that the only parts of Nicole Kidman’s face to move were her eyes? Terrific, gripping stuff.

TRY AS I might, I simply cannot see the difference between sitting in a pub with a pint and sitting in a pub with a pint and a scotch egg. And yet according to the people laying down the law, it’s the difference between life and death. And what, come to that, constitutes a substantial meal? What if you had 10 bags of crisps?