Will this son rise again?
NOBODY in real life actually speaks the way they do in THE DROWNING (9pm), a new psychological thriller going out nightly on Channel 5 between now and Thursday. But that’s fine, I’m not complaining, because the way they speak in The Drowning makes it nice and easy to follow.
“You’re going to think I’m mad,” says Jill Halfpenny’s character Jodie to her ex-husband Ben (Dara Devaney). “I’ve just seen him. Our son.”
“You’ve seen Tom?” Ben replies. “I don’t understand…”
Right, so this pair obviously had a son.And the son was calledTom. And something dreadful must have happened to him. If only there were a further line of equally unlikely dialogue to offer us a clue.
Oh hang on, hold your horses, here’s Ben again…
“He died Jodie.”
Oh dear, I feared as much. How awful. But wait, it seems Jodie’s not done yet… “You don’t know that,” she’s insisting. “They never found him.”
Aha. So what we have here is a mum they’ll all insist is in denial, desperate to prove that this lad of theirs, nine years on, didn’t die at all but was abducted.
Sounds like the makings of a decent enough drama. I might actually stick with this one.
But where does Jodie begin in her quest for the truth? Goodness knows. If only there were a part-time teaching vacancy at the school where she reckons she’s spotted her missing boy, now in his teens.And if only the school’s interview procedure were ludicrously lax, bearing in mind Jodie is actually a landscape gardener.That way, she could land the job, get to know him and maybe solve the mystery.
Elsewhere, BRADLEY & BARNEY WALSH: BREAKING DAD (8pm, ITV) moves on to Slovenia. “It’s a country that you don’t think of…” remarks young Bradley, although I’ve checked on Wikipedia and it turns out that’s not its official motto.
Among the latest life-threatening treats lined up for our intrepid pair are motocross, ski-jumping and Quidditch.
Yes, Quidditch – as played on flying broomsticks at Harry Potter’s Hogwarts. I hadn’t realised this, no doubt owing to the pathetically sheltered life I lead, but apparently it’s played for real all over the world, albeit with a lack of actual flying, which I’d have thought defeated the point.
Before having a go themselves, Bradley and Barney have a pitchside natter with national captain Tomas. Behind, a game is in full flow – 14 grown-ups lobbing balls into hoops, each sat astride a broomstick-length pole.
“In order to play Quidditch, you need a really special kind of people,” says Tomas, proudly.
“Yeah, I don’t doubt that…” says our Bradley.