Artificial face of the future’s pretty awful
JUST in case you didn’t think you had enough to worry about, up crops a new one: the next breed of robots will be yobs. Yup: flawed artificial intelligence means robots will be racist and sexist, according to a new study.
Our automated friends are learning “toxic” opinions via the natural language of the people who create them, thinking, for example, that all women are homemakers, black men are criminals and latinos are janitors (don’t write in – I’m just reporting what was said).
Great. As if we women weren’t already patronised enough, along comes another entity to put us in our place: “Robot, make me a cup of tea.”
“Shouldn’t you be doing that, Virginia? It’s not as if you have a job to do!”
“Robot, pay my credit card bill.” “My, we’ve certainly been spending a little too much on clothes recently, mm? Don’t you already have three black dresses? What do you need another for?”
“Robot, choose a book for me to read.”
“Here you are, Virginia. This one has a lovely pink cover because I know how much you girls love your chick lit! I chose The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire for your husband, by the way.”
“Robot, cook supper. Roast beef followed by chocolate cake.” “Are you sure that’s wise, Virginia? You should be eating less meat to save the planet and as for the cake, I don’t want to be personal, but we’ve put on a few pounds recently, mm?”
“Robot, clean the house.” “You know, Virginia, housecleaning is a very good form of exercise. And I’m in the middle of a discussion with your husband about the geopolitical implications of raised tensions over Taiwan clashing with the border disputes between China and Kashmir, all at a time when the global economy is being rocked by the sabre-rattling aspirations of large swathes of the East.
“But don’t worry your pretty little head about that. And don’t forget to dust under the stairs!”
OR PERHAPS the new breed of robots will turn out not to be just racist and sexist but like Hal in the film 2001, who, to be honest, I always found a little bit smug.
After all, these robots will not just be able to talk down to us: they will be able to operate in extreme temperatures, both hot and cold, will never need to sleep or rest, will never have a bad hair day, get too fat for their favourite outfit or experience existential doubt about their ultimate place in the universe.
And judging by some recent news reports, they’re also going to be better looking than us.
Intolerable. Someone pass me a watering can.
At least they rust…
“Always keep your bowler on in times of stress, and watch out for diabolical masterminds Emma Peel (The Avengers)