The Northern Powerhouse
IS IT just possible that Matt Hancock’s appearance on I’m A Celebrity… could turn him into a national treasure? I know he’s currently firmly in the villain camp and it’s hard to see that changing, but the new version of Hancock’s half hour could be therapeutic and just what the nation needs as we all vote for him to do one unpleasant bushtucker trial after another, and could give birth to the unthinkable – a country feeling sympathy for Matt Hancock.
Lockdown Matt, or Love Rat Matt (whatever your preference) may soon become more famous as Bushtucker Matt. Snakes, spiders, kangaroos penises – we all know there won’t be a trial too tasteless for him to do, and whatever the public and ITV ambush him with I can assure you Matt will simply smile and crack on with it, for he has skin as thick as a rhino and it will serve him well on the show.
Mind you, his trademark Tiggerish enthusiasm, which he’ll deploy for every challenge, might just stop people voting for him to do them and may even earn him some grudging respect. It will be interesting to see how long Matt lasts in the jungle, and while he’ll be desperate to win, his reported £400,000 fee will make losing less painful for him.
He’ll be able to produce tears too as he lounges in the jungle, sharing intimate moments with his fellow contestants about his marriage break-up and finding new love.
AND he’ll make sure we all know about the pressures of being the Secretary of State for Health, while plugging his book, Pandemic Diaries: The Inside Story Of Britain’s Battle Against Covid. Maybe we will also find out how he had the time during the pandemic to write those diaries and why he needed a ghost writer – the excellent Isabel Oakeshott – to publish what is supposed to be a diary. Matt will be able to set out his lockdown narrative without other politicians being able to challenge him on the detail.
So is it too fanciful to think that Hancock could not only win I’m A Celebrity… but also the nation’s affections? Well, maybe so. After all, you can’t make a crab walk straight – as his campmates will no doubt discover – and, as things stand, it seems more likely his local Conservative Association will deselect him for the next election than him becoming jungle king.
But don’t be surprised if he defies political gravity, like Boris Johnson has done many times… Thinking about it, wouldn’t BoJo be a cracking contestant in the jungle?