Grin and bear it, Susan

THEY say you should never meet your heroes, that you’ll only be disappointed.And I do believe there’s a lot of truth in that. I once met Coronation Street’s legendary super-villain Richard “Tricky Dicky” Hillman and he turned out to be a thoroughly lovely chap.

Didn’t so much as lay a finger on me, let alone wallop me with a crowbar or try to drive me into Weatherfield Canal. What a letdown.

But while I assumed the advice to keep your heroes at arm’s length was commonly understood, it appears to have escaped the attention of Channel 5’s cheery travelogue lady Susan Calman.

Either that or she’s chosen to pay it no heed.

Visiting the Yorkshire valleys tonight for the first in her new series of SUSAN CALMAN’S GRAND DAY OUT (Channel 5, 8pm), she not only seeks out “one of the most important people in my life” but – having been introduced and clearly feeling more than a little starstruck – asks if she could possibly be left alone for a moment with this absolute showbiz legend.

Sounds a bit full-on, doesn’t it? A bit awkward, even.

“It’s not normally allowed,” her host feels obliged to point out, “but for you, absolutely.”

To Susan’s evident relief (“I’m slightly frightened about how emotional I was getting…”) this man then makes his exit.

Once it’s just her and her hero in the room, Susan turns to the camera and explains to us why this moment means so very much to her. “I became a stand-up comedian,” she reveals, “because of Billy Connolly…”

Ah, so now it all makes sense. What a privilege indeed!Who doesn’t love the Big Yin, eh? “...and because of this bear,” she continues. “Like, literally, this bear. Because Fozzie was a stand-up.”

Standing in the glass cabinet behind her is indeed the wisecracking Muppet himself.The absolute, 100 per cent certified genuine one.Well, all right, one of the absolute 100 per cent certified genuine ones. He’s not saying a lot, nor in fact moving, but Susan doesn’t seem too bothered.

“I cried when I interviewed Billy

Connolly,” she admits, “and it’s exactly the same meeting Fozzie Bear.”

Yes, this extraordinary museum, The Bear House, in a purpose-built building in the gardens of Newby Hall in Ripon, does touch Susan very deeply. Understandably so.

Also living there, among more than 1,000 vintage teddies, is the Paddington Bear that was used in the stop-motion TV series, plus an original Sooty.

Sadly, I don’t think visitors get to see Sooty’s panda girlfriend, whatever her name was. Soo?

No, that would be an overreaction. Just put something in the complaints book.