Mum had a stroke but medics said she just had a migraine
To mark Stroke Awareness Month, last year’s Apprentice runner-up Rochelle Anthony tells Lizzie Catt about her mother’s devastating experience
Last year was a rollercoaster for Rochelle Anthony. In March, viewers of The Apprentice saw the salon owner from Bedfordshire go head-to-head with fellow contestant Marnie Swindells in the show’s finale.
Despite narrowly missing out on winning a £250,000 investment from Lord Alan Sugar, Rochelle was soon making the most of the resulting boost in business and profile.
But in October, the 37-year-old’s world was turned upside down when her beloved mum Dolcie – known as Dee – suffered a stroke, which was undiagnosed for several days after paramedics said she was only experiencing a migraine.
“Mum is the backbone of our family, especially since I had children” says Rochelle, mum to Bentley, seven, and Hallie, four. “We call her a powerhouse, the woman doesn’t stop. So for her to have gone through something like this has completely rocked our family.”
After decades running their own businesses, Dee and Rochelle’s dad Steve had moved to Italy to retire. “But when I got pregnant, she moved back to my village,” says Rochelle, who owns The DollsHouse Collective in Milton Keynes.
Rochelle was preparing to drop off her children at her parents during half term last October when she received a phone call from her father,
Steve, 75.
“I’m very close with both parents but Dad’s number only comes up if it’s Mum using his phone. I usually take the kids over but he was offering to collect them, so I had a feeling something was up, but he said everything was fine.
“Later that day, I got a message from my mum saying, ‘I called an ambulance today. I couldn’t get out of bed, I couldn’t move the entire right side of my body. But the paramedics said it wasn’t a stroke and I didn’t want you to worry’. Obviously my jaw hit the floor and I called her straight away. I started looking up symptoms – Dr Google will always send you spinning – and told her it really sounded like a stroke.
“She insisted she was fine but the next day, she still looked really pale and drawn, felt dizzy and groggy, though her face hadn’t dropped and she was talking fine. She wanted to wait and see how she felt.”
By Monday, however, Dee again was unable to get out of bed. “She finally agreed to let Dad and I take her to A&E, where she had MRI and CT scans and doctors confirmed that she had actually had a stroke.
“Her blood pressure was super high and she was kept in for observation. I just sat on the end of her bed – Mum’s not someone who takes naps but she was in and out of sleep, she couldn’t keep her eyes open. She’s always been so strong and seeing her weak and vulnerable was horrible.”
Dee was discharged three days later and Rochelle says the family have felt like they’re in limbo ever since.
“Mum has a really supportive GP and the hospital staff were amazing, but as soon as you are discharged, you’re on your own.
“We had lots of questions and felt really in the dark. We had to do a lot of research and paid for a private scan, which revealed mum still had fluid on her brain. She’s waiting for an NHS appointment to find out if the fluid needs to be drained, but that isn’t until August.
“The time around Christmas was horrible, worrying if she might have another stroke, seeing how slow she was. It’s always the two of us in the kitchen and I was cooking by myself.
“It’s so scary when somebody in your life undergoes such a massive, life-changing thing. Mum’s in constant pain from the fluid on her brain. She feels she’s living with a ticking time bomb.
“She still feels tense, tight and uncomfortable and walks sideways down the stairs because she’s nervous. But she’s having physio to work on her mobility, she’s staying on top of her medication, and we’re all trying to keep her stress levels low.
“It’s been really hard for Mum to accept that she needs to slow down, but she knows how important it is.”
This Stroke Awareness Month, Rochelle’s urging anyone worried about themselves or a relative to seek help.
“I feel like my parents’ generation can be really apologetic, not wanting to take up anyone’s time. Learn the signs and act as soon as you can – you might not have all the symptoms. Don’t take no for an answer.”
For information, help or advice, visit the Stroke Association’s website (stroke.org.uk) or call their helpline on 0303 3033 100
‘‘ She said she was fine but she still looked pale and felt dizzy and groggy