Christmas disasters we eagerly await are looming. Corrie’s Sally looks as if she’ll be having her first taste of prison turkey, and it’s not beyond the realms of possibility she’ll be sharing a wing (accommodation and poultry-wise) with Emmerdale’s Debbie. Over in Walford, EastEnders’ Alfie is intent on delivering the perfect Slater Christmas (which can mean only one thing – Armageddon). His great idea is delegation of duties and finding a solution to overcrowding in the Slater household (he’s only just noticed? The place is a Tardis).
The Vic’s grotto is something to look forward to, although how it’s going to distinguish itself from the grottiness of the place on a daily basis is anybody’s guess. It looks like being a grotty time for Emmerdale’s Bob, when, a week before Christmas, the twins ask for expensive gifts and he has to ponder taking a job as an elf. Given that you can count the goodies the pair have ever had on one hand, they should be grateful for a tangerine in a sock; as for Bob dressing up – well, the way this show invents ever more ingenious ways to force guys to get their kit off is, truly, genius. No complaints here.