EASTENDERS

■ RUBY SEES RED

Why is there only ever one booth free when people decide to have their not-so-friendly chats at the club? It’s not as if people are queueing up at the door, but, no, everyone gravitates to the same Argument Booth.

Ruby and Stacey are there for another Battle of the Brunettes (pictured), where Stacey has a plan to expose Ruby’s pregnancy as a lie. She’s invited Kush along, although what she hopes that will achieve is anyone’s guess, especially as the real object of her dreams is Martin (talk about dreaming small).

Stacey isn’t the only one hoping to win

back her man; Sharon is hoping for a Phil reunion, too, and thinks there might be more to it when Phil invites her for dinner. Given that everyone in Walford has barely eaten a thing during the past year, I’d just grab a doggy bag, fill it with what you can, and put thoughts of sex on the back burner. But what’s the real reason for Phil telling Sharon that he’s not ready to resume their relationship? Maybe he’s worried he’ll need a stun gun for those quivering lips if he wants to kiss her.

Just remember what Psychic Jaci told you weeks ago!