CORONATION STREET

■ BLOOMING TROUBLE

Don’t lurk. If there’s one thing that nobody ever learns in soapland it is that nothing good ever comes from lurking around corners, listening in on conversations not meant for your ears. Peter, bearing flowers (pictured), is the latest victim, when he hears Carla and Lucas discussing ‘sales figures’ (that old chestnut); but what are they really discussing that sends Peter into yet another spiral of despair? Suspecting that Carla has spent a night with her old flame, Peter sits down for a heart to heart and Carla wonders if it’s she who’s driving Peter to drink. Hardly. He doesn’t need much driving. He’d squeeze himself into a Dinky car if he thought it would get him to a pub before last orders. Carla’s never sober enough to get behind the wheel, anyway; it would be a case of the blind drunk leading the blind drunker. There’s some much-needed light-heartedness when Mary and Dev try to impress Nina with a Cauliflower Wellington and a lesbian French film (they’re spoilt for choice on the movie front – I Googled the genre, although I’m not inspired to download Les Filles du Botaniste – The Chinese Botanist’s Daughters – anytime soon; I’m just not a plant person). Although Asha’s embarrassed, Nina’s touched that they’ve gone to such efforts.