Guns blazing at the Bistro!

masked gunmen enter the Bistro, point a weapon at Ryan, and demand he hand the stash over. Sam, the only wise person in this asylum of lunatics, dives under a table and calls Nick, who answers to the sound of a gunshot. As Nick, Leanne and Damon race towards the forever doomed hostelry, they fear for Sam and Ryan. The police, in a rare display of promptness, arrive, and yet again it’s Craig, the ubiquitous copper, and a sniffer dog too. What, again? My guess is they’re only after the steak. Will this precipitate the end of Damon and this ludicrous storyline? We can only hope.

On a more light-hearted note (and heaven knows, we need them at the moment), Bernie discovers that she is a natural at golf, and the Ladies’ Captain tells her they’ll waive her membership fee at the club and offer her a scholarship. For someone who can’t afford to buy a packet of burgers for the nine people at home, how’s she even going to buy the right shoes, let alone a set of clubs? Maybe Stephen has a set lying around. Surely he must have cracked a few skulls with them over the years.

Talking of Stephen… he’s up to no good again, colluding with Sarah, Michael and a man called Rufus from Donahues, who is keen to see the entrepreneurs’ samples. Incredibly, he decides he wants exclusive rights to their products – shoulda gone to Specsavers. Having told Rufus that Carla is his PA, will Stephen be caught out when Rufus starts chatting to his taxi driver, who is none other than Peter? Naturally, the foghorn doesn’t stay quiet for long, so has Stephen been rumbled?

Craig talks with Nick and Leanne after the robbery and (inset) Damon tackles one of the gunmen