Oh boy, it’s tough for Faye to give up at top of her game

DECIDING when to walk away is difficult for any athlete. Sometimes it is just a question of age; for others it is finally accepting they are no longer the very best at what they do.

Some, such as Tottenham defender Ledley King, have their decision made for them: their bodies simply cannot take any more.

Former England football captain Faye White knows how that feels. She has broken her nose five times, had numerous injections just to get on the pitch and surgery on both her knees. She has spent weeks running in a field on her own, ‘ crying because it hurts so much’, so she can do the thing she loves most: play football.

White was prepared to do it again this year, too; prepared to work her way through hours of rehabilitation at Arsenal after a double knee operation to be in with a chance of playing for Great Britain at the Olympic Games. She knew her body might fail her, but she couldn’t stop herself trying. ‘I’m just too determined,’ she says. ‘I can’t not try.’

But then White, 34, found out she was pregnant. The decision was made for her.

‘ You have the excitement of being pregnant, but also the sadness of losing something that has become so important to you,’ she says.

‘You think you will have a family — and you want to — but for so many years I’ve put football first.

‘There was a part of me that thought it was great, but there was another part that thought, “Oh. This means I can’t do it any more”.

‘I knew straight away there would be no more England, no Great Britain. I’ve got quite a rational head but maybe my heart was pushing me on. ‘Perhaps this is meant to be.’ White (above) announced her retirement from international football in April, having won 90 caps for England. She is delighted she is expecting a boy, but there is a grieving process to navigate, too. White has been a footballer for 15 years and, although she will still work at Arsenal and be a BBC pundit during the Games, this identity has suddenly gone.

She makes a joke out of the fact that people are ‘ much more considerate now’, seeing her as a future mum ‘rather than just the England captain who always seems in control’.

But that sudden lack of control, and the changes that are happening to her body, have been incredibly difficult to handle. ‘ It’s so hard,’ says White. ‘ This is all I’ve done for the last 15 years. I know people will probably think, “Oh, it’s women’s football. In the past you used to do your job and football was a hobby”.

‘But I think I’m one of the first generation who feel like we have been professionals.

‘It’s my life — off the field as well. It’s hard switching it off.’