Would you lather your face in lard?
It sounds revolting but devotees swear it’s the secret to softer skin, so...
DIETERS trying the Palaeolithic or Stone Age diet, where you follow an eating regime similar to the one we enjoyed in prehistoric times — all animal and plant products, nothing manufactured — have discovered a surprising side-effect to the eating plan.
Handling the large quantities of meat the diet includes left them with noticeably softer skin on their hands. As a result, women have been inspired to apply animal fat directly to their faces, in the same way as our great-great-grandmothers might have done before the advent of the industrialised cosmetic industry.
It sounds absolutely revolting — not to mention what it must smell like — but, intrigued, I set myself the challenge of moisturising once a day for a month with pure animal fat . . .
WEEK ONE: I SMELL LIKE A BUTCHER!
THE week before Christmas, I visit the Cosmetic Imaging Studio at Harvey Nichols for a Visia face scan, which will show the state of my skin. I’ll have a second scan after four weeks of slapping on lard.
Then, I head to Waitrose, which is teeming with shoppers lunging towards tubs of goose fat in which to roast their potatoes.
I reach for a 250g packet of Kerrymaid lard — pork fat — costing 54p. The woman next to me casts a glance at the scrum around the goose fat and winks.
I’m pretty sure she has no idea my lard will not be going anywhere near a turkey or potatoes, but straight onto my face.
That night, I remove the packet from the fridge, but find the fat too solid to rub on my hands. After 45 minutes at room temperature, it has a malleable consistency, so I take a deep breath and scoop some up with my finger.
I have cleansed and toned my face before bed, as usual, but instead of applying my shop-bought moisturiser, I rub a blob of lard on my cheeks. The smell is stomachchurning — like the floor of a butcher’s shop — and I expect to wake up the next morning covered in spots.
To my surprise, the following day there is no discernible damage to my complexion.
WEEK TWO: MY PILLOW IS COVERED IN FAT
AFTER seven days, I can see no difference to my skin — but at least I haven’t had an outbreak of teenage acne.
The biggest hurdle is the psychological one. But I gradually stop thinking about it and, at times, almost forget it is not my normal moisturiser, but some pig fat.
After all, the consistency is little different from a thick night cream and I find I need only a tiny amount as it spreads so easily.
Because I am using such a small quantity, it appears to be absorbing into my skin and I stop noticing any smell. The downsides are that when I try to wash my hands after application, it takes a lot of soap to get them clean. And I can see greasy smears on my pillowcases every morning. Yuck!
WEEK THREE: I THINK IT MIGHT BE WORKING
JUST when my resolve is beginning to wane, because I am tired of scrubbing my fingernails every evening to remove lard traces, I receive an unexpected boost to my confidence. My husband tells me how good my skin looks.
I dismiss his flattery as trying to keep my spirits up, but as I get ready one evening to go out to a party, I am thrilled to note how smoothly my make-up glides on.
Often in the winter, my skin can be dry and my make-up doesn’t seem to ‘sit’ properly. Perhaps this is working after all!
But the smears on my pillowcases are reappearing as fast as I can wash them. And, although I may have got over the psychological barrier, I am not sure, despite his compliments, my husband has. He has never before given me any beauty advice, but has become strangely insistent that the application of lard is the very last thing I do at night.
I can see why the Victorians (who used to make face masks from lard and bone marrow) had separate bedrooms.
WEEK FOUR: HAVE MY WRINKLES GONE?
WITH only one week of the experiment left, I am beginning to wonder if I will actually miss my cheap and effective lard moisturiser.
I have barely made an indent in the 250g packet, and get a thrill from knowing I have not only saved money, but also have a smoother complexion.
I typically look at my worst in January, when I am run down and exhausted after the festive season. But on my new regime, my skin is thriving and the confidence it gives me seems to be having a knock-on effect on the rest of my looks. Am I imagining it, or do I even look a little less wrinkled than the 40something mum- of- three who started this experiment a month ago? There is only one way to find out — and so I head back to Harvey Nichols for my follow-up scan.
THE RESULTS
MY INITIAL scan to assess skin texture, tone, redness, blocked pores and uV damage, showed I had more redness than you would expect for someone of my age, but fewer wrinkles and better texture.
When my face was scanned again, some of the results were startling. My redness had improved by an incredible 43 per cent, putting me in the top quartile.
My skin tone had improved by 30 per cent, my fine lines and wrinkles reduced by a further 10 per cent and my skin texture was 7 per cent better than before I started applying the lard. But my enlarged pores had increased.
My left side also showed slightly more improvement than my right. Nick Sinclair, the Cosmetic Imaging Studio founder, suggested this may be because I sleep on my left. ‘When you are moisturising hands or feet, you are encouraged to wear linen gloves or socks to keep the moisture in and not let it rub off. The same may be true of your pillowcase.’
I showed the results to cosmetic dermatologist Dr Anita Sturnham, founder of Nuriss Skincare and Wellness Centre in london.
She agreed there had been an astonishing improvement in the redness of my face. ‘I think you may have an inflammatory skin condition called rosacea, which can cause redness, sensitivity and thread veins,’ she tells me.
‘It’s possible you may also have been suffering from changes in environment, such as moving from heated rooms to the cold outside. This dries the skin and leads to redness. But, as the lard creates a barrier, moisture is no longer being lost and you’re protected against fluctuations in temperature.’
The redness might also have been caused by a reaction to my normal beauty products. ‘Things such as glycolic acid, found in lots of skincare, can cause irritation,’ says Dr Sturnham.
So, am I convinced animal fat is the way forward for skincare? While I am thrilled with my skin tone and reduced redness, I am not keen on the idea of more blocked pores. The smell was also off-putting.
But I will pay closer attention to the ingredients in over-the-counter skin products, as I may be sensitive to some. And if I run out of moisturiser, I’ll know I have a substitute in my fridge!