Today’s poem

A NEW CHEST OF DRAWERS

We bought some new drawers from Ikea; They looked beautiful on the shop floor. Of course they were sold as a flat pack; As most furniture is from that store. But that wouldn’t present any problems, With ‘easy-to-follow’ instructions included. However, that’s where we made our first big mistake: We were well and truly deluded. To think that assembling a small chest of drawers Would be quite a simple affair. How wrong could we be? Because, right from the start, The old man had started to swear. He managed to build the carcass, But the drawers just wouldn’t slide in — They seemed to be two inches too bulky, Or was the housing two inches too thin? The blame had to be pinned on someone; The fault was all mine, of course For wanting new drawers in the first place. Oh dear, was this grounds for divorce? A few angry words were traded Before we conceded defeat, And collected the diverse bits of timber, Then re-packaged them all nice and neat. Took a photo and put it on eBay, Displayed it to its best effect, And described the condition as ‘Perfect, Best Offer and Buyer Collect’.

Delia Bennett, Shepshed, Leics.