THE POSH SIDE OF PORTUGAL
IF YOU’RE staying in a villa at the Vila Vita Parc Hotel, a personal butler and an infinity pool (with optional swim current) come with the territory.
But I’m in the imposing, newly renovated, adults-only building: The Residence. My grand suite has pale wood floors, glossy white contemporary furniture, a shower so big it could double as a car wash and a sunny terrace.
Vila Vita is in Porches, a small town a 40-minute drive from Faro in southern Portugal — but it’s a long way from the hen parties and stag dos that may fill your plane on the flight over.
It’s not the only luxury hotel on the Algarve, or the newest, but in terms of space, few can match it. The weekend I am here, all 170 rooms are booked. But I see the other guests so rarely I never get to recognise any of their faces.
It mixes modern interiors with traditional exteriors: whitewashed walls, terracotta roofs and rolling gardens. Every room has a view with a balcony or terrace. No rooms are at the back, so you won’t be left overlooking the car park.
The family pool is popular; I opt for the child-free areas and am joined by a maximum four other people (once) at one of the seven other pools. The hotel sits on 54 acres — that’s vast, the equivalent of 864 tennis courts.
There are tennis courts too, of course, along with a golf course, a spa and a gym with personal trainers ready to whip you into shape. Even paddleboard yoga — where yoga is combined with stand-up surfing — is an option.
Possibly the impetus comes after a meal at the hugely popular Ocean, one of nine restaurants at the five-star resort and the proud recipient of two Michelin stars. I fear I’m too unsophisticated to appreciate endless courses of ‘deconstructed’ food. I always want to say: ‘Sorry, what is it?’
I prefer the informal Adega restaurant, serving lobster and prawn rissois (the menu describes it as an Portuguese gastronomy’).
I venture out once to take in a couple of local fishing villages — though they’re not as unspoilt as you might think, with English cafe menus and Guinness logos on bar signs. So I beetle back. Once you’re ensconced at the Vila Vita, there’s no reason to leave.