Who’s more bonkers: me or Yoko Ono?
Yoko ono has just won the observer Lifetime Achievement Ethical Award. Half of these thoughts are hers and half are mine. Can you tell the difference? Answers below. 1) IMAGINE the clouds dripping. Dig a hole in your garden to put them in. 2) Get a telephone that only echoes back your voice. Call every day and talk about many things. 3) DRAW a line with yourself. Go on drawing until you disappear. 4) empty your head. pour water into your ear. you have become a bucket. Open your mouth. Water a flower. 5) KEEP coughing for a year. 6) this is a piece of sky. hold on to it. After ten years we will get together and put the sky back into one piece. 7) CUT a hole in a bed sheet. Put your head through the hole. Step into a washing machine. Tell your friend to switch it on. Watch the world spin round and round. 8) FiVe hundred noses are more beautiful than one nose. 9) TAPE the sound of the lake gradually freezing. Drink a cup of hot chocolate afterwards. 10) yOu cannot walk through a wall unless it has a door. 11) EAT your soup with a fork. Treasure eternity. 12) LeArn something new every day. Drop a pebble in the ocean. the pebble has become wet, but the ocean has not become dry. 13) THROW a stone into the sky high enough so it will not come back. 14) GO tO the middle of the Central park pond and drop all your jewelries. 15) WAVE to your toes. Watch your toes wave back! Yes! They love you! 16) COunt the numbers of lights in the city every day. make a number list and hang it on the wall. 17) FILL your shoes with sand until there is no room for your feet. Now you must walk barefoot. 18) A LADDer is for climbing up, as well as climbing down. 19) A LADDER without rungs is just two long poles, not joined together. 20) BeFOre you climb up a ladder, remember to check it has rungs. 21) IF THERE are no gaps between the rungs, then your ladder is a plank. 22) steAL all the clocks and watches in the world. Destroy them. 23) COUNT the numbers of wrinkles on your face or your body or certain parts of your body. Send it to your friend in place of a letter. 24) tAke the first word that comes across your mind. repeat the word until dawn. 25) IT’S Christmas time. Ask a friend to pull on your hair. And another friend to pull on your toes. You have become a cracker. 26) imAGine letting a goldfish swim across the sky. Let it swim from the east to the West. Drink a litre of water. 27) YOU cannot drink a glass of water. You can only drink the water. 28) A BABy is an umbrella. hold it over your head to keep off the rain. 29) TAPE the sound of the moon fading at dawn. Give it to your mother to listen to when she’s in sorrow. 30) peeL an apricot. place it between your toes. put on a sock and walk to work. When you arrive, your foot will be very messy. But the sky will still be blue. yoko loves you. ANSWERS: 1,2, 3, 5, 6, 8, 9, 13, 14, 16, 22, 23, 24, 26, 29 are by Yoko. The rest are mine.