Confessional

What your optician really thinks about you

THIS is a very intimate job. During an eye test, I’m often just a couple of inches from clients’ faces. You would be surprised what an optician can tell about you: I can smell whether you drank too much wine last night or had a crafty cigarette on the way in, which you tried to cover up with minty chewing gum (that never works, by the way).

Over the years you learn to cope with such things without flinching — it’s a skill you develop.

What concerns me far more than oral hygiene, however, is the length of time people will leave between having eye tests. Men often refuse to accept that their eyesight is going downhill with age, and wait to be forced into making an appointment by their wives.

I hate to think how many male drivers out on the road are still insisting that they can see perfectly, when in fact everything’s a blur.

For women it’s different. If a woman leaves years between appointments, it’s normally a sign that she’s not taking proper care of herself. I see so many middle-aged women squinting through dirty, outdated frames. I try not to judge them, but I do think: ‘How can you neglect yourself like that?’

Your glasses are such an important part of your look — they are often the first thing people notice about you. What does it say about you if they are scratched and shabby?

It’s always wonderful when you coax someone out of a beaten-up old frame into something modern and flattering. There’s nothing like seeing a woman’s eyes light up when she realises you’ve revamped her entire look and taken a few years off her, too.