Should you SUPER SIZE your TV?

TELEVISION is the last refuge of the snob, or so the broadcaster Justin Webb said this week.

no, he’s not talking about what’s on — he means the box itself. Because there’s nothing the middle class love to hate so much as those behemoth screens that cost the same as family cars, and aren’t much smaller.

Radio 4 presenter Justin waited until his wife, sarah, was abroad before treating himself to a whopping 65-incher. since when, he reports, ‘ a class division’ has opened up in the Webb household. Justin and his teenage kids love the expansive new telly; sarah emphatically does not.

it’s not the first time the nation’s television sets have sparked a class row. When i was young, it was colour that divided the wheat from the chaff. And the chaff all had it.

in 1976, a Tory MP picked out colour Tvs as the needless indulgence of welfare ‘scroungers’. if you stuck stubbornly with a black-and-white Tv, you were considered a bit hoity- toity, while the truly intellectual refused to have a box at all.

now, it’s size that divides us. And the bigger and pricier the telly, the more some of us are inclined to sneer about tastelessness. so, should we side with Mrs Webb, or Justin? i put the top-of-the-range, giant tellies to the test . . .

BEST FOR FANS OF FOODIE SHOWS

WHAT IS IT? sony XD8599 (below). it’s a sight cheaper than the others, for starters. Jolly smart, though, with a fantastic picture.

COST: £1,649.

SIZE: 55 in (the screen is always measured diagonally). experts in the Harrods showroom say few consider how far away they’ll be sitting before buying a big Tv. For a 55 in model, 2.5 m is the optimum distance. But for a 65-incher, it is 4 m. People with small living rooms would be wasting their money.

SCREEN: 4K HDR. A television picture is made up of millions of pixels. A 4K screen, the latest big thing, has four times as many pixels as a high-definition (HD) screen, so the images are incredibly sharp.

HDR stands for high- dynamic range — the screen’s dark areas are automatically darker, and the light bits lighter, enhancing the detail.

SPECIAL FEATURES: Above. it’s also amazingly slim, only 4.4 cm deep.

VERDICT: For those who are satisfied with a modest number of bells and whistles, this is just the job.

Amateur chefs will like this — the HDR makes food look enticingly vivid. i was strangely tempted to reach out and grab a coconut macaroon from the screen. 8/10

BEST FOR REAL SELFIE LOVERS

WHAT IS IT? Agath T2. it’s a Tv concealed in an enormous mirror.

COST: £29,750.

SIZE: 47 in ( but you can have anything from 17 in to 65 in, if you’re willing to fork out even more).

SCREEN: 4K.

SPECIAL FEATURES: The mirror — in the model i see it’s almost floorto-ceiling. The idea is that with the Tv off, all you see is the mirror, and when it’s on all you see is the telly. But i was very conscious of my reflection at all times. And i can’t say i’d necessarily want to see myself peering out from Happy valley, still less Game of Thrones.

VERDICT: This is the gimmick of all gimmicks, for folk who have run out of sensible things to buy. it’s perfect for the exceedingly vain, or Premier league footballers. 4/10

BEST FOR THE CHIC AND SHOWY

WHAT IS IT? LG OLED 65eG960. A gorgeously sleek, curved Tv.

COST: £4,399. SIZE: 65 in.

SCREEN: Ultra HD 4K. The curve is intended to make the picture ‘immersive’ — as if it is coming at you. it’s also supposed to be easier to see if you’re not directly in front of the screen.

SPECIAL FEATURES: Most of these Tvs are LED — which means the pixels are lit up by a bank of lightemitting diodes. But this is OLED — organic light-emitting diodes. no, they’re not sustainably farmed, each individual pixel functions as a tiny LED, lighting up independently.

Baffling stuff, but the black bits are blacker, the contrast is better and there’s none of the slight picture bleed you get with LED technology.

VERDICT: ‘The sharpest picture on the market. OLED is the future,’ the expert in Harrods tells me.

But i’m unconvinced by curved screens. They suit those who want a Tv to look like a piece of art, or families who can’t all sit directly in front of the screen. They’re beautiful, but a flourish too far. 6/10

BEST FOR FLASHY FILM BUFFS

WHAT IS IT? Panasonic OLED 65CZ952. A handsome, incredibly slim, curved Tv.

COST: £7,547. SIZE: 65 in. SCREEN: 4K, and not excessively curved (the degree of curvature can vary, apparently).

SPECIAL FEATURES: something called an IPS panel, a sort of antiglare technology that helps you see properly from any angle. it’s all to do with how the crystals are lined up inside the screen.

And something else called a THX certification — dreamed up by star Wars director George lucas’s company, it’s an industry standard all about reproducing the look and sound of a show as closely as possible to how the makers wanted it.

it’s not to be sniffed at. Tvs have to pass 400 lab tests to qualify.

VERDICT: online reviews call it ‘the year’s most out-there Tv’, with a price ‘sure to make bank managers weep’. But i saw a segment of Mad Max: Fury Road on it, and wished i were still young enough to hide behind a sofa. Movie fans, music lovers and show-offs will be hard to tempt away from this. 7/10

BEST FOR TACKY BOASTERS

WHAT IS IT? A customised samsung J7000 — a Tv disguised as a painting, similar to the picture below. You can have any telly customised in this way for a price — it’s a service offered at Harrods. COST: £3,299.

SIZE: 55 in (but could be any size).

SCREEN: 4K. SPECIAL FEATURES: Until you press a remote control button it looks like a perfectly normal painting. Then, the canvas slides up to reveal a Tv.

if you want customised artwork — a family photograph, perhaps — you pay an extra £300. You can also pay more for any of 25 variations on the standard wooden, lacquered frame.

VERDICT: My cousin, Tony, has one of these. He tells me: ‘i know. it’s embarrassing. But the children think it’s unbelievably cool.’ sorry, Tony, but it’s not cool, it’s pure kitsch.

Great for people who like to spend more than £3,000 on a Tv and then pretend it’s not there. 5/10

BEST FOR STYLE SHOW-OFFS

WHAT IS IT? samsung Ks9000. An exceptionally stylish, curved Tv, and more economical than most in terms of electricity usage. COST: £3,199.

SIZE: 65 in.

SCREEN: HDR with something known as Quantum Dot display, offering over a billion colour shades more than most ultra HD Tvs. But it doesn’t offer 3D — which most supersize Tvs do.

SPECIAL FEATURES: it’s as much about style as content. it’s called a 360- degree model, meaning you can walk around it and not see a single screw. The back is an incredibly smart matt vinyl effect.

VERDICT: Critics will wonder if anyone really cares about the back of it. But i do. As will design gurus with really big living rooms.

Frankly, if there was nothing worth watching, i’d be quite happy to turn it round and look at the rear for an hour. 8/10