AN INSPECTOR CALLS His mission: To test hotel hospitality to the limit
BREAKFAST at the Royal Oak in Tetbury does not start until 9am on weekends. Fine with me.
And when it does eventually get going, there’s a help-yourself Bloody Mary bar ready and waiting. You can opt for the traditional tomato juice and vodka concoction, a Bloody Maria (with tequila) or Red Snapper (with gin).
Dogs are welcome at the Royal Oak, there’s a jukebox and open fire. All in all, this 17th century restored inn on the outskirts of affluent Tetbury is resolutely laid-back.
There are six rooms just across the yard off the beer garden. Ours — compact, with a small, but strong shower room and solid wooden flooring — is on the ground floor, so if you open the window and drinkers are outside or having a smoke, you can join in the conversation.
But it’s really not ideal if you’re looking for an early night in summer.
Beer is a big deal here. Uley and Stroud ale seem popular and there’s a pump for Orchard Pig cider. We like the upright piano and the snug at the end of the bar.
You can eat downstairs in the bar or upstairs at rickety wooden tables amid lots of pot plants. The two barmaids look like sisters with their pink hair and piercings — and we are greeted warmly by a stranger when we arrive.
This bonhomie, however, grates just a little in the morning when we wait for nearly 30 minutes for our full English. Coffee is not great, either. The espresso machine stares at us blankly. ‘We don’t use it in the mornings, sorry,’ says the chirpy man who has taken our order. I never get this. Surely, you pull out all the stops on the coffee front at breakfast? This is a relatively cheap stay for Tetbury (£110 for a double on a Saturday) and the relaxed vibe is certainly to be encouraged. But it won’t suit everyone. The royal Oak, 1 Cirencester road, Tetbury, Glos GL8 8eY Tel: 01666 500021, theroyaloaktetbury.co.uk Doubles from £85 b&b