HARRY: I WAS CLOSE TO A BREAKDOWN OVER DEATH OF DIANA
Prince talks frankly of his mental battles Two years of ‘total chaos’ in his late 20s He finally saw therapist on William’s advice
PRINCE Harry has revealed he was ‘ very close’ to a breakdown as he struggled to deal with his mother’s death.
With unprecedented openness for a member of the Royal Family, he said he had ‘shut down’ his emotions for almost two decades after Princess Diana died when he was only 12.
This led to mental health problems by his mid to late 20s, when he suffered anxiety at royal engagements and often felt ‘on the verge of punching someone’.
The prince endured two years of ‘total chaos’ before finally seeking professional help from a counsellor at the age of 28 – on the advice of his brother William.
Harry, 32, told the Daily Telegraph he is in a ‘good place’, but that his bot- tled-up grief affected all areas of his life as he grew up in the public eye.
‘I can safely say that losing my mum at the age of 12, and therefore shutting down all of my emotions for the last 20 years, has had a quite serious effect on not only my personal life but my work as well,’ he said.
PRINCE Harry has disclosed that he sought counselling after enduring two years of ‘total chaos’ while struggling to deal with the death of his mother.
In a candid interview about his struggle with mental illness, he said he ‘shut down all his emotions’ for almost two decades following Princess Diana’s death in 1997, when he was just 12.
He said he spent his teenage years and 20s ‘refusing to ever think about my mum’, and only began to address his grief at the age of 28 after coming ‘very close to a complete breakdown on numerous occasions’.
The prince, now 32, revealed that he suffered from anxiety during royal engagements and had so much rage inside him that he felt like ‘punching someone’.
His brother William eventually implored him to seek professional help, saying: ‘Look, you really need to deal with this. It is not normal to think that nothing has affected you.’
The extraordinary personal disclosures made by the prince are unprecedented for a member of the Royal Family, and are part of his campaign to promote mental health charity Heads Together.
In the frank interview with the Daily Telegraph, Harry said: ‘I can safely say that losing my mum at the age of 12, and therefore shutting down all of my emotions for the last 20 years, has had a quite serious effect on not only my personal life but my work as well.
‘I have probably been very close to a complete breakdown on numerous occasions when all sorts of grief and sort of lies and misconceptions and everything are coming to you from every angle.’
The prince added that he had found himself battling a ‘flight or fight’ reaction at royal engagements, without properly understanding why.
On eventually seeking help, he said: ‘It’s all about timing. And for me personally, my brother, you know, bless him, he was a huge support to me. He kept saying this is not right, this is not normal, you need to talk to [someone] about stuff, it’s OK.’
When asked about professional counselling, the prince said: ‘I’ve done that a couple of times, more than a couple of times, but it’s great.’
While acknowledging that his mental health difficulties have had an effect on his personal life – although he did not mention his previous girlfriends Chelsy Davy and Cressida Bonas – Harry said he was now in a ‘good place’ and was looking forward to having children of his own. He sidestepped questions about his current love life several times – he has been dating American actress Meghan Markle, 35, for the last nine months – but said that he was finally in a position to take his private life seriously. He added that talking about mental health had proved to be the huge turning point for him.
The prince also admitted that he had struggled with aggression while trying to come to terms with his grief, following his mother’s death in a Paris car crash.
He said boxing had provided an outlet for his frustration, adding: ‘I took up boxing, because everyone was saying boxing is good for you and it’s a really good way of letting out aggression.
‘And that really saved me because I was on the verge of punching someone, so being able to punch someone who had pads was certainly easier.’ On the loss of his mother, Harry said: ‘My way of dealing with it was sticking my head in the sand, refusing to ever think about my mum, because why would that help?
‘[I thought] it’s only going to make you sad, it’s not going to bring her back.
‘So from an emotional side, I was like, “Right, don’t ever let your emotions be part of anything”.
‘So I was a typical 20, 25, 28-yearold running around going “life is great”, or “life is fine” and that was exactly it. And then [ I] started to have a few conversations and actually all of a sudden, all of this grief that I have never processed started to come to the forefront and I was like, there is actually a lot of stuff here that I need to deal with.’
Harry dismissed previous speculation he may have suffered mental health issues because of his time in Afghanistan, and said coping with the death of his mother in the public eye had the greatest impact. He added: ‘I can safely say it’s not Afghanistan-related. I’m not one of those guys that has had to see my best mate blown up next to me and have to apply a tourniquet to both their legs. Luckily, thank God, I wasn’t one of those people.
‘I can’t encourage people enough to just have that conversation because you will be surprised, firstly, how much support you get and secondly, how many people literally are longing for you to come out.’
Since learning to talk honestly about his feelings, Harry said he feels able to put ‘blood, sweat and tears’ into making a difference for others. ‘The experience I have had is that once you start talking about it, you realise that actually you’re part of quite a big club,’ the prince added.
Harry said his work with the Army’s personnel recovery unit, where he listened to injured servicemen and women talk about serious mental health issues, had helped his understanding.
‘I know there is huge merit in talking about your issues and the only thing about keeping it quiet is that it’s only ever going to make it worse,’ he said.
He added that he was determined to make a difference while the younger members of the Royal Family like himself are ‘still interesting’ to the public.
He set up Heads Together with his brother and sister-in-law, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge.
‘Sticking my head in the sand’