Blind date

He looked older than I expected – and didn’t give me a compliment Sadly, I picked up very neutral vibes from Nicky

EVERY week we send a couple on a blind date to see if there is a spark of romance, or if their personalities clash. This week Nicky McCann and Johnathon Kaye went to the Cote brasserie in Amersham, Bucks.

Nicky is a lively 57-year-old, living in nearby Hazlemere. She has two sons in their 20s and works as a managers’ assistant.

Johnathon, 59, a driving test examiner from Borehamwood, Herts, has three children and has been divorced for 25 years. They talked to ALANA KIRK about the date.

Nicky, 57, says:

IT’S BEEN a tough year with one thing and another, so I thought I needed to put a smile on my face and get ‘out there’ again. I was married for 18 years, then had a relationship for seven years with someone I already knew. That ended earlier this year, so this was my first date in a very long time.

I did start to think about online dating , but never got very far with it. Now I think I could do with meeting a lovely man, and I’m not going to give up on finding one.

I’m very sociable, and I don ’t want to sit around moping. Ideally, I’d love to meet a kind, funny, open, honest and attractive man. But it gets harder as you get older.

I never see someone I fancy when I go out, especially men my own age and older. I think dating means you meet all sorts of people.

I have a friend who uses Tinder and she has had so many varied experiences. When you’re dating at our age, we have issues and baggage and are a bit more jaded, and it ’s not the same as when you are younger.

I’m quite confident, so I wasn ’t nervous when I arrived at the restaurant first. I saw a lovely man walk in and thought, great! But then his wife walked in and that was that. Moments later Johnathon arrived.

I knew immediately he wasn’t my type. Even though there are only two years between us, I felt he looked older than I thought he would. I think women age better than men. However, that didn ’t stop us having a lovely evening. The restaurant was perfect for a date — busy with lots of atmosphere. I had mussels and steak. We shared dessert.

We talked away , and actually the date went very fast. While there was no flirting or banter , we chatted away very easily . There was no awkwardness.

Johnathon is a very chatty and socially able man. W e talked about our children, and a little bit about relationships, and all sorts of things. I had really made an effort to look good but he never once gave a compliment, which disappointed me slightly.

I didn’t pick up any ‘signals’ from him either. I just don’t think we are well matched. He’s lovely, but we had little in common.

It was a very easy-going evening but there was no romance. W e parted with a peck on the cheek and have swapped a couple of WhatsApp messages since our date. It was good to dress up and feel good again, so hopefully this is the start of my new dating life, and who knows what the future will hold?

LIKE: He was chatty and easy to get on with. REGRETS: None.

CAB/COFFEE: Cab. VERDICT: 7/10

Johnathon, 59, says:

AFTER my divorce I dated a woman for 12 years and after that we finished. There’s been nothing substantial since 2004. I have used some dating sites but find the whole scene a bit disappointing. I can count the number of dates I have been on since then on one hand and would probably still have a couple of fingers left!

In some respects dating is easier because I am what I am and feel comfortable in my own skin, yet in others it ’ s more difficult — as we all get a bit more set in our ways as we get older.

I love live music and concerts and travelling, so would love to find someone to do those sorts of things with. A woman who was into cricket would be a bonus too! I guess I would like to meet a woman who is emotionally soft and kind, who is intelligent and can hold a good conversation.

It would be nice to have some - one with whom to share my day; the near-death experiences which inevitably go hand-in-hand with my job as a driving test examiner, to eat dinner and cuddle in front of the TV — things that other people in solid relationships would take for granted. I felt quite relaxed heading to the date as it was a nice drive up there. When I walked in and saw Nicky I thought she was really attractive. She has a lovely figure, and was dressed beautifully, although she was already seated when I arrived so I only saw her fully at the end of the meal.

The date was very easy-going with flowing conversation, and in the two hours we were there we just talked all the time.

It went by very fast. We touched on previous relationships, where we lived and our children.

On the whole, the date was light-hearted and relaxed. I’ve been on dates where the conver - sation can feel tense and disjointed, but this one wasn like that at all.

Maybe it helped that the restaurant was so nice, and perfect for a date. It was packed but not too loud and had a really good atmosphere. I really enjoyed the food, too.

I think there was chemistry, but I’m not sure. I certainly didn ’t want to rush off, and offered to give her a lift home. She felt comfortable with that but didn’t want to add an extra half an hour to my journey home.

In the end a friend’s daughter picked her up from the restaurant. Nicky suggested we should swap numbers so I texted her to thank her for a lovely evening , and we’ve sent each other a few messages since then.

To be honest at this point I’m not 100 per cent sure which side the coin’s going to flip.

I’ve been dating on and off for a while, and I’ve learned now that I’m sure in my own mind what I want and I’m very intuitive. Saying that, however, I picked up very neutral vibes with Nicky , so I’m finding it difficult to gauge what the next step will be.

It was a great experience and I would like to see Nicky again, if only to see how it might develop.

LIKE: She was warm, attractive, intelligent and easy to talk to. REGRETS: None.

CAB/COFFEE: Coffee. VERDICT: 9/10