Dad’s wish came true ... he remarried mum
My Wonderful dad was a great fan of what we called ‘dad jokes’, and growing up my sister Leisha and i could take our pick of many terrible ones. Like this one: whenever i said ‘i’m hungry’, dad would stick his hand out and say ‘i’m Tim, nice to meet you, Hungry’.
it makes me smile now, but then so does everything i remember about my incredible, kind-hearted, fun- loving dad, who put family before everything.
dad was one of seven children in a close-knit irish family. His parents had moved to the uK shortly before he was born and they instilled in their children the importance of hard work and making something of yourself.
That was never going to be a problem for dad: from a young age he’d resolved to be his own boss and, aged 17, his first step was to become an apprentice carpenter.
once he was qualified he began to travel — first to saudi Arabia and then worldwide, picking up jobs as he went, be it egypt, south Africa or the u.s. if it wasn’t for meeting my mum, denise, he might well have spent his life on the road. But they put down roots in solihull and started a family.
By the time my elder sister Leisha and i came along, dad was running his own building and quantity surveying business. ‘Tim the boss’, as his friends used to call him, worked his socks off to put us through private school and give us the most wonderful family holidays.
But he was always there for us, whether it was a relationship break-up, a fall-out with a friend or just needing a lift home at midnight. ‘Family comes first,’ was his mantra. That remained the case even after he and Mum divorced ten years ago. Mum remained the love of his life and best friend.
dad was on the verge of retirement last year when out of nowhere he felt pain in his left side. it was enough for him to call an ambulance and by the time he’d arrived at hospital he’d suffered a full seizure.
everything went downhill from there: doctors discovered dad had a lesion on the brain and he was diagnosed with stage four brain cancer.
To see our strong, fiercely independent dad go through it all was hellish, yet he kept his indomitable spirit to the end.
Last december he achieved one of his dearest wishes: he and our mum remarried, in a simple and moving ceremony at our family home. ‘i knew one day i’d get you back,’ he told her. He died just a few weeks later in a hospice.
For us, it is far too soon to lose our dad. My sister and i are struggling to come to terms with everything he — and we — will miss: our weddings, his future grandchildren. We were his world and he will always be ours.